IT'S STILL JANUARY.
I AM TRULY SHOCKED.
But the good news is we (somehow) still have 11 months left in 2020.
Something that has been coming up often from people in my DMs and inbox is a question about how to balance multiple goals at once. Here's the best summary...
"How do you avoid the feeling that by working on one goal, you're sort of playing hooky on your other goals (especially those that feel responsible or financially related)?"
Maybe, as you think about the next 11 months, you are wondering this too? Maybe back in the olden days of December 2019 you set 45 goals and now can't figure out how you're supposed to do all of them? (Or maybe you set four and are feeling overwhelmed as well?)
It's super normal that you'd feel this way. You do "play hooky" on your other goals while you work on something else. That's normal too.
I wish you could flip a switch, zone in, and forget about everything else. But until that power exists, here are some exercises to consider.
Choose a stopping point. Before you start working on a project (for work or for fun) decide how far are you going to get. What is your intention right now? Are you going to write a chapter on your novel? Are you going to get the first coat of paint on your bedroom wall? Are you going to plant bulbs in one flowerbed? Are you going to edit 50 photos? Are you going to knit two inches on that sweater? Are you going to draft a newsletter?
It's so important that you know what you are trying to accomplish before you go into a work (or play!) project. Why? Because it never ends! There is always another chapter to write, wall that needs touch-up, section of your garden that needs work, etc. In order to feel the joy that comes with doing something, you must give yourself a set thing to do. This will help you feel more accomplished when you inevitability have to move on to the next thing (or go cook dinner).
If it feels to hard to gauge how much you can accomplish then set a time period instead. Give yourself an hour to write or 15 minutes to sit and knit while you listen to a podcast. Or set aside 20 minutes in your yard. And then allow yourself to take those minutes guilt-free.
Look at your week as a whole. When my kids were younger and not great eaters we had a pediatrician tell us to not worry about what they ate on Tuesday but instead try to see see the whole week at once. So what if Tuesday was only strawberries? Wednesday was grilled cheese for lunch and chicken and peas for dinner. Thursday wasn't bad. Friday was great.
This is the same for keeping up with multiple projects. You don't have to work on each goal every day (or even every week!). It's expected that your focus will change from weekdays to weekends. It's okay if you wanted to read each night before bed but only managed to pick up a book on the weekends. Two nights out of seven is less than you hoped, but it's not nothing.
Take the time to check-in. Don't keep spinning your wheels or hoping that this feeling of overwhelm will go away on it's own. Stop. Sit down. Reflect. What did you get done last month? What are you still working on? What can you let go of? What are three things that you want to accomplish this next month? Write them down. Put your short list somewhere you'll see it as a reminder of where your focus and energy is going this month. Give yourself permission to let the other stuff hang tight while you make progress in just these three areas.
Here is the bottom line: you're never going to be on top of all the things at once. You're never going to have all the laundry washed and all the kids fed and all the baseboards cleaned and all the words written and all the money made and all the projects turned in and all the emails answered and all the miles ran and all the to-dos crossed off.
You're not getting that clean slate.
Instead, you work around what you have. You throw in another load of laundry after breakfast. You keep your eyes on the framed photos instead of the baseboards when you walk down the hall. You type out the words in the notes app when inspiration strikes at the grocery store.
You take deep breaths. You appreciate the fact that this morning everyone was healthy and nobody cried at drop off. You deeply enjoy your lunch break this past week where you got 30 minutes into what you already know is going to be your favorite book of 2020. You find yourself nodding along to a podcast on your long commute home Tuesday night and it's exactly the recharge you needed.
This is it, you know? It's adding together minutes. It's celebrating moments. It's being realistic about what you can do. It's giving yourself grace when stuff is left undone. But mostly, it's taking it one day –– and one action item –– at a time.
