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Hi friend,

 

Last week's letter about problematically fatphobic authors pulled forth deep responses from so many of you, as did discussions on Facebook and Instagram.

 

We have feelings about authors we love, and we feel them deeply.

 

When someone criticizes our favorite works — whether it’s a book, movie, workshop, song, blog or painting — it can feel really bad. That’s putting it mildly.

 

When someone disagrees with us over a minor issue of aesthetics or style, it’s easy enough to either debate, or agree to disagree. But what about when we find out that people and works we admire aren’t as great as we thought?

 

When a person in a marginalized group points out that a work you really love hurts them in some way, it can be hard to put our attachment to the work and its creator aside long enough to listen. It’s time to learn to process our feelings about criticism and use them as fuel for our anti-oppression work in the world.

 

I've created a 15-page workbook with 34 questions for study, reflection and journaling to spark your awareness of—and help you confront—weight stigma and oppression. These questions are an opportunity to grow in your own anti-oppression and Health at Every Size® alignment and knowledge, and work on fatphobic beliefs and tendencies. They are not comfortable questions, but they’re important.

 

The entire workbook is printable at 8.5×11″ paper size and contains space for your reflections so that you can fill it out in your preferred format. You can purchase it here.

One more note on problematically fatphobic works for the moment: No one is saying that you can't, or shouldn't, or are a bad person for, reading and liking books with fatphobia in them. We're all allowed to have problematic faves.

What is happening is that fat people are increasingly pushing back against the idea that we should keep our mouths shut about things that hurt us in the service of keeping the peace. We're pushing back against:

a) recommending these works without even a mention of how harmful they might be for marginalized people (especially largefat and superfat people) to read;

b) providers recommending harmful works to clients/patients due to the power differential;

c) white women with thin privilege shoving their fingers in their ears and screaming at the top of their lungs whenever a fat person dares to point out that, hey, your fave author keeps kicking us in the shins, maybe could we not lionize them to the heavens in Health at Every Size, fat-positive and body-positive spaces?

Reading that as a judgment of your personal worth and morality may indicate a deep discomfort with fat folks having voices and using them, so maybe sit with that for a second.

 

Actually, I had two more notes, come to think of it. I've had a number of requests for non-fat-hating alternatives to the work of Brene Brown, Glennon Doyle, Anita Johnston and other similar authors. If you have any alternatives that you can assure me are free of fatphobia, I'd love to hear and share.

 

Warmly,
Lindley

 

P.S. If you'd like to share this week's letter, it exists on Instagram here.

My favorite image this week:

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Image description: A fat woman in a crop top looks out over water and a city skyline at sunset.

Recent from Me

The Conversation

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Image description: A teal square with a chat bubble graphic and the text, “Fat people deserve to have somewhere they can come and feel safe and accepted and attractive and worthy." Lindley’s logo is at the bottom.

“Fat people can’t be photographers.” Is that true? I’ve spent the last five years finding out, and on this episode of Fashion for All – The Smart Glamour Podcast with Mallorie Dunn I’m talking about what it’s like to break barriers in an image-focused profession.

We talk about:

  • How doing #OOTD (outfit of the day) photos forced me to start seeing my own body
  • Why the people photos you see in ads and on websites always look like models
  • Victoria’s Secret’s bankruptcy
  • My first camera (insert floppy disk here)
  • Whether being fatphobic makes you a bad person

Mallorie is the genius behind SmartGlamour, the fully inclusive clothing line. It’s affordable, customizable and ethically produced, and every single item is available from XXS to 15X. SmartGlamour sets the standard for inclusive fashion and I can’t recommend it enough.

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Image description: A blue patterned graphic with the title, “The Body Positivity Card Deck: 53 Strategies for Body Acceptance, Appreciation and Respect.”

Quick Resources: Prenatal & Post-natal Body Image

Hi! I'm Lindley.

- she/her

- photographer

- author

 

Image description: Lindley, a fat white woman, is shown sitting in a cafe with salmon-pink walls. She has shoulder-length blonde hair and glasses, and is wearing a black top with a translucent blue-and-white patterned jacket. Her hands are on the tabletop in front of her.

Hi! I'm Lindley.

 

I'm a professional photographer (she/her, pronounced LIN-lee) who celebrates the unique beauty of bodies that fall outside conventional "beauty" standards. I live outside Seattle, WA. 

 

I talk about and photograph fat folks because representation of large bodies in the world is vital to our body liberation.

 

 

People come to me for:

  • Body-safe portrait, boudoir and small business photography sessions
  • Diverse, body-positive stock photos
  • Fat fine art photographic prints
  • Health at Every Size (HAES)-aligned consulting, writing and editing
  • The Body Love Shop, a curated resource for body-positive and fat-positive art and products

Pssst! Did a friend forward you this email? If you'd like to get your own body liberation guide every week, just drop your email address here.

 

You're on this list because you're a current or past client or customer, or you signed up on my website.

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