Issue 18 | Nov. 8th, 2021 |

Reify 8&21

Welcome to your 3-minute pause. 

Let's focus on your practice of pursuing awesome.

"Last month—like so many working parents—I was struggling to balance my job and my family. My kiddos were home with colds, and my worries were overwhelming. 
'Maybe I can't balance work and two kids. This is so hard!
I should be grateful for time at home with them. Am I'm taking on too much?
Is their immunity too low? We all need to eat more vegetables.' 
In the face of stress, I was trying to “worry plan” my way out. But in the process, I was treating temporary challenges like long-term problems."

 “Some days are like this. And the only way to get through them is to remember that they are only one day, and that every day ends.”
- Author David Levithan

Eli might have a cold, but he still loves a walk.
"I'm trying to see temporary
to see a hard day as just one day. 
It's a practice of refocusing my attention on the moment rather than on long-term worrying and planning.
Instead of trying to ‘worry plan’ away future sick days, for example, I can give myself permission to just survive. Make a cup of tea. Take a walk. Enjoy some extra family screen time.
It removes the pressure to ‘be ok’ or ‘solve the problem’.
I can just be. Because, after all—This Too Shall Pass."
- Sarah Glova, Co-Editor of Reify 8&21

"OK, it's a no-bones day, 
it's a no-bones day!
But I don't think that's a bad thing."
Tik-Tok star Jonathan Graziano, reporting on Noodle, his internet-famous 13-year-old pug. 
Every morning, Graziano helps Noodle up from the pug's dog bed. Some mornings, Noodle stands. (A “bones day”.) 
Other mornings, Noodle flops down back into his bed. 
(A “no bones day”.) 
Graziano has quipped that a no-bones day isn't a bad thing, necessarily—but a reminder to rest and recharge.

As a Mantra.
We asked our Reify Spotlight Series interviewee Amber Boaz if she had a day-to-day mantra. She shared that her favorite mantra is: 
This Too Shall Pass.”
"The only constant is change," said Amber. "The more I can remember that the better my mental health."
Salesforce Certified Application Architect & Process Automation 
Aficionado Amber Boaz

Change is constant. 
Worrying doesn't have to be.
We asked Reify Spotlight Series interviewee Nicole Dhruv, Data Scientist, to share what she wishes she'd known 10 years ago.
You can't change something just by worrying about it all the time."
Her quote reminds me of how I sometimes  “worry plan” to avoid feeling the challenges around me. 

The power of acceptance.
“While cultivating a positive mind-set is a powerful coping mechanism, toxic positivity stems from the idea that the best or only way to cope with a bad situation is to put a positive spin on it and not dwell on the negative,” said Natalie Dattilo, a clinical health psychologist with Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston. 
“It results from our tendency to undervalue negative emotional experiences and overvalue positive ones.”… 
“Research has shown that accepting negative emotions, rather than avoiding or dismissing them, may actually be more beneficial for a person’s mental health in the long run.”
The key, Dattilo said, is finding “a more balanced approach to how we understand how we feel and what we do about it.”
“It’s okay to have a positive and optimistic outlook and feel sad at the same time,” she said. “We can feel sad and be grieving and still look forward to the future. Both of those are necessary for a healthy outlook and sense of well-being.”

Leaning into it 
might actually help.
"It's he or she who's willing to be the most uncomfortable can rise strong," said Brené Brown to Oprah during a 2015 SuperSoul conversation.
"Leaning into it actually helps you eventually push through," added Oprah.

Cheers to “it's okay"!
“Understanding that… being nervous, having doubts, and lacking confidence, are emotions that are human… is how you deal with it. 
It is okay to feel that way… 
and then understanding that you can work through it.”
- Venus Williams

This Too Shall Pass! 
How are you honoring your needs in these passing moments?


Great job!

Way to take a pause and give 3 minutes to your practice of pursuing awesome with this issue's theme. You rock!

Want more from our inspiring feature?
For more inspiring quotes and stories from this issue's Spotlight feature, check out the Reify Spotlight Series post: 

Reify 8&21 is a digital publication 

intentionally sent on the 8th and 21st
to disrupt your status-quo 

with an encouraging reset.


Photo Credits: 
Photo of Dr. Jamie Zuckerman from her website:
Photo of woman taking a breath by Hannah Busing on Unsplash.