The Call for CONNECTION

 

I first heard the phrase holiday heart from an otherwise very healthy friend who experienced a cardiac emergency a few Decembers ago. The term refers to the increase in heart conditions linked to the seasonal consumption of alcohol, salt, and fat (as well as the end-of-year stress related to family, money, and work). It makes this time of year not only most wonderful, but also most deadly. Number one day for most fatal heart attacks: December 25th. Second: December 26th. Third: January 1st.

 

"Wintering" is a term from Katherine May (see below) that promotes a conscious relationship to the season. Wintering invites us to be more in tune with the rhythms of nature, of our nature.

 

We are nature. We are animals. As other animals and all of nature pause and replenish during this time of year, it is only us humans that demand of ourselves and each other to be active (and actively festive) when maybe what is most needed is rest and retreat.

 

I used to dread winter. But when I follow the cycles of light and energy around me, mimic the animals, and honor my deepest instincts (keeping lights low when it is dark outside, basking in the light that does appear – including aided by lamps, doing less, sleeping more, warming myself with nourishing baths, food, herbs), I can feel very well in winter.

 

 

For those of us in the northern hemisphere: May we find synchronicity with winter – not simply to endure this season – but to learn from it, receive its gifts, and thrive in its wonders. May we be well in the heart of winter.

 

A variety of balancing foods and herbs support me in winter. I don't eat or drink cold things at this time of year, and I lean into teas and tinctures that support deep rest. Slathering my body (and especially my feet) with sunshine in a bottle is a nightly ritual. (And if you are as obsessed with the magic of body oiling much as I am, may I recommend this and this). Also, baths. Also, naps.

 

Frederic is half Danish but I'd been traveling to Denmark for a decade before I met him, so my knowledge of hygge goes back over twenty years. Hygge is a whole vibe seemingly built around the Scandinavian adaptation to intense winter darkness. Often described as “coziness,” hygge is referenced year round in Denmark but invites a special synchronicity with winter. Warmth in the form of lighting is key  – that's why Danish lamp designs are so iconic (also, Danes burn a LOT of candles which can be toxic – I only use cleanburning beeswax candles from here). Warmth extends to comfy clothing (I learned how to dress properly in winter from Scandinavians), beautiful surroundings (again, Danish design!), conviviality (I've been doing lots of audio-only phone calls and loving it over zooming), and anything else that adds to a sense of contentment. 

 

Katherine May spoke to Krista Tippet about her book Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times and what she shares goes beyond the literal season, applicable to all times personal and collective (including our current one) when the need for pause and replenishment must be honored. “Not that you would wish for it or wish this thing for anything else, but… ‘They are asking something of us,’ our winterings. ‘We must learn to invite them in’ and to stop wishing it were summer… that is really the hardest thing to believe, when you’re in the midst of that dark place, is that there is a summer on the other side of this; that there can be.”

 

The winter solstice is near. Since ancient times, humans have celebrated the shortest day of the year with rituals and monuments honoring the returning light. Nancy Holt built her massive Sun Tunnels in 1976 as a physical manifestation of this cosmic occurrence. 

 

I've come to understand so much about the elemental nature of the seasons through my dear friend Lindsay Fauntleroy (whose forthcoming book on the five  elements I'm so thrilled about). It's from Lindsay I first learned that winter is signified by the most yin element, water. Winter invites us into the deep, still, fully receptive nature of our being. As she succinctly states: Water invites us to surrender... to allow transformation... and to get out of the way.

 

My favorite winter album is Brian Eno's Thursday Afternoon. Its gentleness does not compete with the stillness of the season. I find it resonant anytime of day, but, despite the name, especially when I rise, with above mentioned candles burning, drinking my matcha, as I do morning pages (another nice seasonal vibe).