Hello First name / Community—
Here's a theme that has been coming up in conversations recently: Running on Empty.
Busy-ness. The hustle. The grind. The push, pull, and tumble of relentless tidal waves that constantly draw energy from you. Hours sinking into days, sinking into weeks…
Like the shorelines of our oceans, after each new wave you find yourself feeling more eroded. It can feel exhausting.
Do these questions sound familiar: How do you find more support for yourself? How do you sustainably move through your day while not depleting yourself?
Like building a seawall stone by stone, think about the things that build you up.
- What, Where, Who, When brings you connection with joy?
- What, Where, Who, When offers you unconditional support, encouragement, love, and energy?
- What, Where, Who, When adds to your foundation?
Jinkies that’s a lot of questions. What’s the answer?
Researchers have estimated there are approximately 7,500,000,000,000,000,000,000 grains of sand on earth. And yet, there is an even greater number of answers than grains of sands. Every unique individual experience connects to an exponentially larger number of possibilities.
So how to work with all this? The central principle clear:
It is not sustainable to keep draining yourself for everyone and everything else. You must recharge your batteries, fill up your own cup, and nurture your own spirit.
I have included a reflection exercise below to help explore options. This is one possible way of exploring these questions. I’ve used this practice in the past on my own and through guided support. It can be helpful in gaining some perspective and awareness of where to begin.
As you know from your yoga and mindfulness practice, with greater awareness there is more agency to respond and to act with purpose and intention.
Note that the outcome doesn't always need to be a major to-do. What is accessible to you right now? Where can you find a tiny bit more ease, peace or joy? Sure, that epic vacation you’ve been putting off will be great to get away from the daily routine. Or the often repeated “after <insert arbitrary time/event here> completes, then I will have more time.”
What about today? What about right now?
- Read a few pages from a favorite book or a new one you’ve been waiting to pick up
- Take a couple of seconds to send the friend you’ve not connected with in a while to say “Hi, thinking of you. I am thankful for you. Love you!”
- Go for a walk by yourself or with one of the folks who offer you their support
- Invite a few minutes of savoring your coffee or tea instead of grabbing and sprinting out the door
- Turn off the TV and turn up the music and have a “I’m eating my Cheerios dance party!” (it’s a thing – trust me)
- Write in a journal or create a tiny piece of art
- Go outside. Close your eyes. Place one hand on your heart. Place the other hand on your abdomen. And breathe.
Whether it is big or small, alone or with others, can you build resistance to dragging along. Draw from the people, places, and experiences that offer you peace, love, and support. That will strengthen your heart and help reduce your suffering.
Warning: This may feel selfish. “I have so much to do. I can’t possibly find the time for myself.” Make no mistake about this. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
You are far more able to meet the needs of the day when you engage with that which supports your inner peace, love, grit, strength, and grace .
And like your movement, yoga, or meditation practice – it never has to look a specific way. Don’t fall for the bullshit social media depictions of what "quick fix selfcare” looks like. Small doses of consistent effort are more powerful at creating a cumulative effect.
Connect with what will anchor you and support you against the flowing tides that want to drag you along. Your possibilities are endless. Your time here on this planet is not. Don't wait for later to start.
Above all else, be compassionate and kind to yourself. You’re an epic, amazing, limitless heart doing the absolute best you can. Nobody is more worthy of love, kindness and support than you.
This being a human thing is hard sometimes. You are okay. You are doing fine.
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