North Star, PDM

 

I have learned to love winter: the biting cold when I walk across our field, how it stings my face and brightens my eyes; how it smells to walk in the door afterward. There's something about being outside in the cold that makes the inside that much sweeter. We light a wood fire, play a Celtic playlist, break out the knitting or the read-alouds or coloring books and markers. This is the cozy season.

 

When you don't see the sun 210 days of the year and snow coats the ground for five months (at least) joy has to be created, because it usually won't be found. Isn't that how it is in a lot of life? I spent most of my twenties dictated by my circumstances and emotions. If I was having a bad day I would count the “bad” things that happened and exclaim over just how awful it all was. If someone else was having a bad day I would live on edge, anxiously trying to please them and manage their emotions.

Living circumstance to circumstance, feeling by feeling, didn't leave much room for true, abiding joy. As Elizabeth Elliott said, I found to be true: “The answer is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances.”

 

Those circumstances are a bit like the biting wind and 15 degree temperatures. They nip and bite at us, sometimes they oppress and suffocate us. And yet the darkness and heaviness of the circumstance is just what makes coming home to God's heart to sweet. So warm. So welcoming. Here the door is open, the music is on, it smells of cinnamon and fresh coffee and bread just baked. You don't have to go anywhere, do anything. You get to just live.

 

 

Running away from His Word is not the answer and shutting off your heart to prayer will not make you stronger. The strength to face a winter comes through utter dependence on the One who holds the world together by His wisdom and grace. Here we can cast ourselves; here I have cast myself when there was no answer to my broken body, when my husband lost his job while I was pregnant, when we had to leave a job and a church and my husband woke up with nightmares from the horror of it all. When I woke up with nightmares from postpartum anxiety, when those anxious dreams came true as smoke filled our house and I snatched my four month old from his crib -  in those winters, I cast myself on the God who sees. The easy thing would be to quit seeking Him. The easy thing would be to blame Him for it.

 

The strong thing is to trust His goodness. The strong thing is to remember all you learned on the easy days and let it be real for now. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So how do you break the cycle? GOOD NEWS! I have an entire episode on repentance coming in just two weeks to Verity Podcast - and I am so excited to have it available. You had so many questions on this topic and I'll be discussing repeated sin, “presumptuous” repentance, what Scripture says about repenting and more. For now though: The key to putting confessed sins behind you is asking if you have 1) intellectually recognized the sin as sin; 2) emotionally grieved the effects of the sin (are you responding to the Spirit's grief over this?) 3) set up boundaries: “bearing fruit in keeping with repentance”. If one of these is missing, it was not true repentance.

 

If all three exist but you are still going backward, recognize these thought patterns for what they are: the condemnation of the enemy. Then reject them outright! “In the name of Jesus, who took these sins from me, I reject this thought. I am a child of God. I no longer am bound to those patterns. I am free.” Then move forward in that reality!

 

 

I think this is a very broad question and the beautiful thing is that the Spirit will apply it differently person to person. Your culture, family, current life stage, and job all play a factor in how you handle your money. At the same time our money is incredibly spiritual - it comes under the authority and guidance of God (as all things should for Christians). The more wisely we handle our money, the more free we are to be generous and bless others. 

 

Josh and I have remained on a constant learning curve with our money. We used Financial Peace University to get out of Josh's college debt when we were first married. That was a huge gift - the method works. However, we found that FPU didn't address the heart attitude toward money. My favorite resource for that is Your New Money Mindset. This book pointed out that a scarcity mindset - “there is never enough” - affects ALL Christians regardless of how much money they have in the bank. It can make someone dismissive (spendthrift) or stingy (hoarding). That may be a good start! Grab it here. 

 

 

 

 

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