First name / ,,
Last weekend, I gathered a group of friends to celebrate my husband Johnny’s 45th (!) birthday.
We met our friends for a pre-drink, took a ferry to a restaurant in Shelter Island, had an amazing meal in a
cozy restaurant, and then all made the trek back home. Some traveled from a bit away and some left their kids with a babysitter, but we all got there because it was important to mark the moment i.e. celebrate the good stuff.
Sometimes when I look at a date with a friend on my calendar in the middle of a long week, especially when the weather’s bad, I want to cancel. But the majority of the time, I muster the energy to get there, and when I do, I’m always happy I went.
You see, in the 18 months between 2018 and 2020, I lost four people I loved very much. Three out of four were tragic losses, people gone way too soon. Whenever I think about going out in the rain to celebrate a good occasion or just to connect, I think about how life is short and how much I’d give for a few more holiday dinners or birthdays with them.
Which is why I put on my rain boots and get myself out the door.
With my clients, at the beginning of each call, I ask for a list of at least 3 celebrations that have happened since the last time we talked. Sometimes, someone has five all written out, ready to go. Other times, someone rattles off two and then gets stuck. I try to push a little for them to find something else good that has happened. When they inevitably do, they’re surprised about the good thing that was there all along.
Being good at celebrating can be like building a muscle; the more you do it, the more easily it comes.
Now tonight I have a birthday party for a dear friend that starts at 10:15 PM (!)
Do you think I'll make it?! You already know the answer :)
