Something you wouldn't probably know about me is that I've had thyroid issues off and on for about 13ish years.
It started in my mid twenties with routine bloodwork that came back I was hypothyroid. I was surprised as I've never had anything point to this and didn't have symptoms.
I was about 2 years into healing some pretty serious anxiety and part of that was finding my truth and my voice, and learning how to set boundaries while speaking my truth in a heart centered way.
Because I became immersed in the holistic healing arts it made complete sense to me from an energetic/emotional perspective as to why I'd have thyroid issues--our issues live in our bodies and my throat wasn't happy with all I've allowed myself to swallow for the first 25 years of my life.
I didn't know what it was like to say no, or put my needs first…in fact, dear Universe, the guilt and fear I'd feel if I dared to.
I remember asking my doctor at the time what it looked like if I did go on a thyroid med, and what it looks like to get off of it…
She paused and in complete honesty looked me in the eyes and replied
“I don't know….I've never taken anyone off of it before."
With my growing holistic background, I KNEW I could heal this without a med--and I did.
I mindfully continued to engage in my own healing via therapy, healing foods, herbs, yoga, energy work, and my blood work started coming back balanced again.
Fast forward many years into my 30's and after starting to see an amazing naturopathic doctor, I've learned my thyroid is imbalanced again (gah!).
I teeter on and off the line of hypothyroidism, and now Hashimoto's has presented itself.
Besides having a hoarse voice sometimes (not great considering most of my work is talking lol), again, wouldn't have really known.
With her grounded knowledge and guidance, I began to get better--then I had a huge year last year and early into this year that although has birthed amazing opportunities, has also been quite emotionally stressful.
Literally, the month my partner and I moved across the state, my Hashimotos numbers have steadily crawled up as it coincided with my stress.
In disbelief and resistance, I listened to my naturopathic doctor put a pharmaceutical thyroid med on the table for consideration, and luckily she explained in a way I could hear it:
“It would be at least for a little while to give your thyroid a break”.
This helped my perspective because, again, I KNOW there are things I haven't explored yet to help out, and I truly believe in the power our bodies hold with the right support.
AND….
I'm at a moment where it makes me wicked sad to know my thyroid is working so hard to try and be balanced and I've done things to try and help it.
I'm at a moment where I don't want to surrender to the fact a pharmaceutical is on the table (I want to be clear that I'm not against them;) We have incredible advancements and support because of medications that literally save lives and help people function better. It's the system that I can't get behind).
I'm at a moment where it feels like opening myself to this option could be beneficial, even if parts of me don't want to hear it.
With this inner shift of perspective and thyroid trying so hard to do its job, I decided to give it a break and take the med.
It took me quite a while to get here, and I know I'm in good hands. I asked my body about taking this and it said YES--that was a huge moment because my body let me know it would be helpful.
So, I started the med this Monday, and brought it into ceremony to welcome this medicine into my body….and to release resistance even a wee bit.
Because, if I am so resistant, how will my body energetically respond to RECEIVING this medicine?
Will it be able to fully receive it…?
I held it in ceremony, I talked to it and to my thyroid and I cleared it with words and chants and incense and my master crystal (bc….energy is everything;).
I surrounded it with love petals and a RECEIVING blend another healer/friend made for me:)
I honored the brilliant minds and hearts of those that created this SO people could feel better, and cleared any “big pharma” energy from it--including my mind that wants to automatically go there and despise the grossness of the system.
I thanked my lucky stars for the privilege to have access to all forms of medicine, and be able to make my own choices around it.
I now choose to see this as good MEDICINE that will help me rebalance this important part of my system.
And….I feel better about saying YES to it. In fact the card I pulled perfectly is about surrendering--to stop the internal fight and fall into the arms of something that might work out.
Perhaps, in your own way, you can relate to the struggle of making the right choices for your Self, to sitting with resistance, to hating the system yet seeing the potential for help, to RECEIVE, to change your mind, to surrender, to try something new on, and to allow yourself to fall into the arms of that of which you resist.
Whatever “medicine” is knocking on your door, may you consider it/sit with it, and feel into whatever may be aligned action for yourself around it. May you talk with resistance, and most importantly, ASK your body it's own wisdom;)
PS--feel free to try out taking those things that are a thorn in your side and bring them into a space of honoring and curiosity--the answers that come through when you give space to allow that “thing" to be heard might surprise you.
Talking about receiving….
Join us this Sunday!!
There a very limited spots left for this circle--here's a snippet of info:
You will experience heart holding and releasing through channeled messages of the Akashic Records, a group clearing, going within to get clear on what is being asked to be revived and then reclaim that for yourself with a powerful guided meditation, journaling, receiving a personalized reading, and going home with your own specific Soulwork to stay in the revival.
And, we might sprinkle a few extra things in here to make it super yummy;)
