First name / Friend! The other week I went to the amazing Mom 2.0 conference in Scottsdale, Arizona. As I mentioned, I spent the first couple of days as a girls' trip with my closest circle, and then joined the bigger group. While I usually love joining bigger groups (hello, have we met?!) something unexpected happened on the first morning of the conference. Sitting at the breakfast table with both my friends and a bunch of new people, I felt a little sinking in my stomach. The new people weren’t exactly MY people, and we didn’t have an immediate zing. ( Hotel Transylvania reference, anyone?) “But okay, I’ll just get through the next couple of days,” I thought to myself. And then, I met person after person after person who just lit me up! I teared up with excitement and understanding at some of the keynote speakers. I had conversations with people I knew but didn’t know! We all exchanged information, planned future parties, and of course I invited almost everyone over for pizza when they are in town (One of the major benefits of owning a chain of pizzerias!) At the end of the 2.5 days, the new friend I was sharing an Uber with had to drag me out of the room to catch a plane as I said to her, "just one more conversation, with just one more person.” And I was exchanging texts with people along the lines of “did we really just meet 2 days ago?!” So what’s the lesson here?! Keep an open mind, you never know what you’re going to find? That there’s so much room in your life for new friends? That opportunity is everywhere as long as you keep your eyes open for it? Open a restaurant so that you can invite everyone over for dinner? ALL OF IT. On that note, here are some of our bullet points from our panel!
How to have your friend group double as your executive board: - Know your role, but also be able to morph into others. Think The Babysitters Club, Sex and the City, The Golden Girls. Are you the camp counselor, the nurturer, the planner or the fun-maker? Be that, and also be other to step into other shoes when needed.
- Get yourself in the right rooms, and pay close attention to who makes you feel sparkly. Surround yourself with more of those people.
- Put yourself out there. This means technically (ask ppl on friend dates) and less-technically by making yourself vulnerable. (As Jen Hatmaker said at Mom2.0), “invite safe people in.”
- Show up, show up, show up whether it's to celebrate everything, be there for each other during the lows.
- Make time for friendship. One of my favorite ways to do this is to co-work, do errands together, or feed two families at one person's house.
- Ask for and accept help. This goes back to honestly and being vulnerable. Ask for what you need, and allow your friends to step in an give it to you. Our friend Hitha has a How to Take Care of Hitha cheat sheet, a genius idea!
- Check your jealousy at the door. Sometimes friends will either hang out without you or have opportunities that you want. Be happy for them, and understand that everyone will have their time to shine.
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PS. I'm opening group coaching in a couple of weeks and the program itself starts the week of June 5th. |
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