If you’ve visited a lot of gyms, especially the smaller ones, as you’ve being introduced to the facility and other members, it’s usually part of the sales pitch. Stop me if you’ve heard it, “You’ll really be able to focus on training hard because everyone knows to check their drama at the door and everyone is professional.” In many cases, that’s absolutely true. But when people say that they never say how to do it. It’s more of a general statement that translates to, “if you had a bad day, don’t bring it in here.”
However, we all have bad days. Sometimes, the memories of events of that day follow us around in our minds for a while. It could be anything, because what constitutes a bad day can be a little different for all of us.
By understanding that there is no magic pill to stop your mind from racing or replaying moments in our minds, we know it is something we must learn to deal with and control.
It is a proven fact that memories associated with unpleasant feelings and anger can cause us to become physically upset once we recall that memory. Think about that, a memory can trigger a physical response in a person. If you’ve had a daydream that triggers an unpleasant feeling (like the memory of a breakup, job loss, or a time you were disrespected), you feel it. Sometimes your skin gets a little warmer, maybe a little red, and you might notice yourself sweating a little more.
Which brings us back to the topic of bringing your bad day with you to the gym like it’s a training partner. With the understanding that your drama should not enter the gym, what do you do when you’re approaching the front door and can’t seem to shake the distraction of the day’s events?
This is where I want to help by introducing you to the topic of what psychologists refer to as thought-stopping. This exercise is part of a cognitive technique that is intended to change your mindset into one that is ready to train. It is also used frequently in cognitive-behavioral therapy.
Your mind, when trained, is strong enough to control what you think about. That is the premise of thought-stopping. But, in order to do that, you must work on your mindfulness. Having the understanding and awareness to know when your mind is creating negative thoughts helps you identify the problem. Once you understand the problem, then next step is acceptance. If you have a problem you can fix, then you know your next step is to solve for it. If it is a problem you can’t fix, then you have other decisions to make, but either way avoiding the thoughts or denying they exist won’t work.
Understanding the source of your stress and accepting the existence of the source are the keys to improving your negative thought suppression. Let me give you an example. Let’s say one of your coaches gave you some feedback that hurt your feelings. You didn’t say anything at the time because you were still trying to process it, but ever since it’s been on your mind. Now, it’s the next day and you’re back at the gym having thought of a million ways to tell off your coach. That is the moment you catch yourself and stop the thought.
Catching these thoughts and replacing them is what thought-stopping is. Instead of envisioning a bad conversation, envision one with you working hard in response to that feedback. Find that underdog in you and prove your coach wrong by learning from mistakes and working hard.
This s a technique that can help in life as well. Have you ever texted someone and not heard back for a day or two? With a lack of information, our minds tend to focus on worst case scenario. This is a thought-stopping moment too. By suppressing those kinds of thoughts with positive ones, you can keep that baggage out of the gym, away from your job, and hopefully outside of your home.
So, while thought-stopping isn’t some magic pill that will make your problems go away, with practice and mindfulness, it can be a life-changing skill. Once you master it, you can leave your baggage in the trunk of your car and walk in anywhere with a positive outlook and energy.
