Welcome to the July newsletter ladies and disappointments!
I hope everyone's summers are going amazing and you're feeling fabbi flirty and fun!!!
Something that has been on my mind lately is different types of intelligence, and how our traditional views of intelligence puts us in SUCH a small box - and one that can have lasting effects on our confidence!
I've never considered myself to be a particularly smart person. I wasn't necessarily praised for my intelligence, and my friends were the one's winning academic awards and getting into Ivy Leagues, so I didn't really identify with being smart, nor would I have used it as an adjective to describe myself. I struggled with math BIG TIME. The math was quite literally never mathing for me. I remember being in 2nd grade and we would do these things called “multiplication minutes” where there was a little worksheet and you had to do as many multiplication tables as you could in one minute. Some kids finished the entire thing before the minute was even up, but for me, I always felt so ashamed that I didn't even complete it. And more times than not, a lot of my answers were wrong. Ugh, I kinda want to cry thinking of sweet little 2nd grade me in her Canadian tuxedo and Sketchers, looking around the classroom wondering how everyone was doing it so fast, and why I couldn't seem to get it. With that being said I'm also PMSing, so an ad with a cute kitten could make me cry.
The crazy thing is, early on, I based my perception of my intelligence on how I couldn't measure up to my classmates in some areas, and not on how I excelled in others. The famous story my mom likes to tell about the moment she realized I was going to be a handful was when I was 2 and sitting in my highchair. Apparently I looked her dead in the face and said “so.. are you gonna teach me how to read??” Needless to say, I went to preschool really early lol. I also had these books with cassette tapes to help with reading and taught myself to read by about 3.5 years old. And then in first grade, I went to a new school and we took reading comprehension placement tests. I placed as a 5th grader, so when the rest of the kids were learning how to read, I would go into this area of the room and read my own books.
But in my little mind it was never, “I struggle with math, but I'm hey, I'm really good at reading!” It was, “Everyone understands math, and I don't." It didn't come naturally to me like reading and writing and drawing and painting did. I also didn't see my artistic abilities as anything to write home about considering it was treated as an extracurricular all the way through high school. I didn't see it an area of intelligence to be proud of because it was never treated as such. Like in high school, while my friends were excelling in AP Calculus, I was excelling in AP Art and SCRAPING BY in Algebra 2. The fact that they couldn't draw for shit (sorry guys lol) didn't matter in the eyes of our academic system, but the fact that I basically have to count on my fucking fingies did.
It didn't help that some of my teachers kinda saw me as a lost cause I think. For example, in 7th grade I would always take opportunities for extra credit in math, and there was this one assignment where you had to solve math problems to plot out these points on a grid, and in the end it would create a picture - kinda like a connect the dots where you have to calculate shit to find the dots. I did it, and when the picture came up, I colored it in all pretty and added all these details and was excited to turn it in. And when I did.. she didn't give me the extra credit because some of my calculations weren't right. I cried. You can see why I didn't feel very confident in my academic abilites.
It also lead to my general disdain for school. Teachers frustrated me, homework felt like bullshit busy work that they were PILING on top of us.. all of this work and struggle and for why??? Just to get into a good college? By my junior year of high school I didn't even WANT to go to college. My mom made me though, and I'm glad she did even though I fucking HATED every second of it. But when I was a senior in high school, and my friends were getting into crazy good schools left and right, I just wasn't. And I felt ashamed. I also grew up in such a small town and it felt like it was a competition to see who could get into the best school, and if you didn't you were kind of a loser.
I turned this in to my English teacher when I was a junior in high school simply because I was sick of her shit. She was a ridiculous and mean person and I was over her. Problems with authority who???
The apple really didn't fall far from the tree though. My mom found my grandpa's report cards from high school and he got straight D's. If you were to base his intelligence off of those grades and nothing else, you might think he wasn't super bright. The reality is, my grandpa was a fucking genius. And I don't mean that figuratively, he was very literally a fucking genius. Like, had multiple degrees and doctorates, had some honorary doctorates from major universities, was probably a spy in the Korean War (he never said anything but we found some documents that point to such), and was the founder of Cal Poly Engineering level genius. Once he went to college and was able to take classes in his area of intelligence, he went from being perceived as maybe not exceptionally intelligent, to being one of the most highly regarded people in industrial engineering like.. ever.
Like him, when I went to college, I got straight A's and graduated Cum Laude a year early. I think my final GPA was like a 3.98 or something. And I'm not saying that to brag, I'm saying that to point out that when I was learning in my own area of intelligence that my brain was naturally inclined to understand, I excelled. In high school, I was told that when I went to college I would be challenged in unspeakable ways, and in reality, college didn't feel like a struggle, nor did I feel any shame in my academic abilities. I don't think working with your own brand of genius applies just to academic endeavors though. Your favorite influencer? She garnered an audience of however many millions of people and made an entire career out of it based on something that others can't grasp, and is probably a genius in something that can't even be taught. Comedians posses a type of intelligence that many people straight up don't. Let's break it down.. it's called having a SENSE of humor. “Sense," BY DEFINITION, means “to be aware of (something) without being able to define exactly how one knows.” You can't really teach someone HOW to be funny, you either have it or you don't. Actors?? There's no denying that Daniel Day Lewis is a fucking GENIUS, and for all we know he had shit report cards. His brain works in a way that a neurosurgeons simply doesn't. But BOTH types of people can be exceptionally smart in different areas, and should BOTH be celebrated as such.
I often wonder what it would be like if school wasn't treated as such a standardized thing. Where everyone wasn't just learning to pass a test. Would people learn how to embrace their own unique styles of learning and areas of intelligence? I don't know about you, but I'd much rather have a doctor who was fucking GREAT at science, but sucked ass at history than someone who was pretty average in all subjects. I also didn't know I had ADD until I was like 27, and I wonder if there were classes for neurodivergent learners if I would have done better. Would I have enjoyed school? Would I have more self confidence? If artistic ability was treated like something more than a hobby or craft, would I have felt the same level of shame that I did growing up? Who's to say. I just think its time we expand our view of what we think what constitutes intelligence, and what it is limited to.
OKAY PHEW… that was a long one!! I'd love to know what your thoughts are! Did you struggle in school? Did you Microsoft excel in school but didn't feel prepared for real life? I'm curious to know everyone's perspectives!!
Big month for movies!!! Oh my god I could barely keep up with all the releases, but nothing makes me happier than a summer of good movies.. especially since we haven't had great summer movies that weren't a fuckin Marvel blockbuster in a MINUTE.
SHOULD U SEE IT? JULY EDISH
No Hard Feelings: I had very little expectations, but it actually wasn't that bad! It was a 90 minuter, which you now is my favorite. We had a packed theater and there was laughing throughout. There's a scene where Jennifer Lawrence is nekkid and fighting on the beach and its fucking absurd and hilarious. If you wanna see it, see it! But if you miss it, it would be perfect to catch on an airplane. Or even as a streamer.. but I don't love streaming movies cause it just doesn't feel right to me lol.
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny: WELP.. I thought I was going to enjoy this one more than I did. It also got great reviews so I was confused when I caught myself anxiously awaiting its ending cause it just kept dragging on. I thought it must have just been me, but the general chatter while leaving the theater was that it was not good. It was over 2.5 hours and I honestly think it could have had an entire hour cut. However, they had some amazing VFX where they aged Harrison Ford backwards and it was really remarkable and he looked fooiiine as hell I cannot lie. With all that being said, if you were my friend (which you are) and asked me if you should see it, I would straight up say no.
Joyride: It was fine! The humor is very 17 year old boy, so it was still funny but wasn't smart in any way. Our theater was laughing and it was enjoyable, but I wouldn't say you need to run to go see it. Catch it on a streamer or on an airplane (but only if there are no children within eyeshot of your screen…)!
Theater Camp: This movie was a delight and a fuckin HALF. If you love quirky, off beat humor along the lines of Best In Show, this movie is gonna be one of your new favorites. RUN don't walk!! Support small films!!
Oppenheimer: I can't believe it's finally here. They started promo for this in LA, I shit you not, like 3 years ago. Which drove me INSANE. But now that I've seen it, I'm less mad. It kinda did live up to the hype and I do think you should see it, if not just for the historical retelling of the story which, according to experts, is pretty accurate. If you aren't interested in history or film at all, you can skip it because its a three hour COMMITMENT. But if you are into the award shows, you're gonna have to see it for homework because it WILL be nominated in LOTS of categories across the board. My predictions at MINIMUM will be Christopher Nolan for Best Director, Cillian Murphy for Best Actor, RDJ for Best Supporting, Best Score, Cinematography, and Hair/Makeup.I saw some criticism regarding the lack of Japanese POV prior to seeing it, but now that I've seen it I understand why they weren't part of the story. The movie was about Oppenheimer's personal life, the group of scientists working on the discovery, Oppenheimer's concerns with nuclear implications, and the Atomic Energy Commission hearings. The dropping of the bomb and the war itself was not in the movie basically at all. Personally, I'd like to have an entirely separate movie representing the Japanese POV because I don't think it should just be a few scenes, it deserves its own story with it's own major characters. They also completely glossed over the US government's displacement of the Native American people at the testing site in New Mexico, although it was mentioned in passing. But again, I don't want one scene for that, I want the entire story told from the perspective of the Indigenous people affected, not as a footnote in Oppenheimer's story.
Barbie: I've waited YEARS for this to finally come out and my GOD it didn't disappoint!!! We laughed, we cried, I legit had a smile on my face the ENTIRE time. If you don't go see this in the theater you should honestly go to jail. Everyone was PERFECT and Ryan Gosling… wow wow wow. First of all that man is so hot even as KEN. Second of all, my prediction is that he will win the Golden Globe for best actor in a musical or comedy and will also potentially be nominated for best actor at the Oscars but for that one he'll be up against Cillian Murphy so he won't win. But he wins ALL the categories in my heart. Michael Cera as Allan was my surprise favorite, but truly every single character was a 10/10. The soundtrack? Amazing. I also would literally watch the entire movie JUST for the moment Ryan Gosling says “SUBLIME!!!!” Obsessed.
Honorable mentions: Two movies I rewatched this month were Pee Wee's Big Adventure and Sweet Home Alabama and I forgot how good they were! Pee Wee's Big Adventure makes me LOL literally the entire time and Sweet Home Alabama is just that quintessential early 2000's romcom that they just don't make anymore! I highly rec both.
Moving onto some of my favorites of the month…
And finally.. what I'm currently up to!
Work wise I've got a handful of things going on! I introduced some fun, one of a kind themed charm necklaces that I'm in love with and even decided to offer them as custom pieces! You can order one for yourself here. I'd be SO excited to make you one!!! Also, YES I'm going to release some of the colorful charm necklaces like the limited edition “Clusterfuck Necklace” from last summer. Those will come out in August.
I'm also making a new perfume!! I'm in the very beginning stages so I can't tell you when it's gonna come out, but I CAN tell you its gonna be really fucking good. I can't wait to share it with y'all, I've been wearing some samples and I get A LOT of people asking what I'm wearing. Probably more than they even did with Blood Sugar Baby which is really saying something.
Alright.. that's it from me! Thank you again for reading and for sharing this newsletter with your friends! It means a lot to know these bring you some sort of happiness or something to ponder about and I love you so much!
