Hi First name / friend! Melody here! I have so much to share with you! We’ve been talking about this newsletter for a long time, and I’m so excited we’re finally doing this. I’ve loved reading the first several issues written by the other designers; it’s so wonderful to have a space to share our thoughts and experiences and ideas with you. |
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In honor of my first newsletter, I’m opening a pop up shop with some new art prints and stickers. More info at the end of this article! |
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For several years, I’ve been craving a way to share more of myself in a way that feels natural rather than performative. I think of this as a way of taking up my own shaped space. Like, we’re all born to be unique little amoeba-shaped blobs, but one of the hardest things is relaxing into that shape rather than trying to expand or conform to the circles or squares or triangles we think we’re required to be. Social media seems like the stage where we are all trying to prove which shape we are. I try hard to be my authentic self on social media, but just being on that platform often makes me feel like I’m performing my life rather than sharing it. Not being a natural performer, I’m self-conscious in that feeling. But even in the midst of that self-consciousness, I sense the presence of people who I genuinely want to connect with. Sometimes it feels like the right people in the wrong location. When Sarah came up with the idea for this newsletter, I automatically felt like this was the solution I'd been craving. I’ve already spent much of this year thinking about the idea of connection. It started when it was time for those of us in the Ruby Star Society studio to begin brainstorming ideas for this year’s Quilt Con booth. I have two studio-mates, Audrey and Meagan, who both started their jobs over a year ago after my co-worker Devon left to pursue her pattern company (shout out to @missmake!). Audrey and Meagan were both new to booth planning, and we talked about all kinds of ideas for this year’s RSS booth. We chatted with the designers about creative themes and design ideas, and various games we could play, or perhaps bringing sewing machines back to our booth. We even considered creating some sort of club house. But before we could decide on any of those details, we first needed to know what we wanted to say, and only then could we decide how best to say it. After months of conversation, it became clear that what we most wanted was connection. We wanted to create a space where people could connect with us and connect with each other. Once we set out with that intent, each detail became apparent. And after so much work and planning, it was a joy to stand in our Quilt Con booth this year and watch people connect. I loved cheering for people during our daily Show and Tell, and sitting down with others to write postcards to people who couldn’t be at the show. I loved watching people make things with our fabric, and seeing our block swap wall evolve each day as blocks came and went. I was amazed by the support I felt each day of people who lined up to buy something from our shop. On the last day of the show, I had the opportunity to share a little more of myself in my Quilt Con talk, and I loved the conversations that I had afterwards, and the new friendships I made. I left that show feeling re-energized. My cup was full. |
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Our super cute Quilt Con booth right after setup, and later full of people finding ways to connect. |
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After looking at our work through the lens of connection, I began to realize that it is one of my core values, and also something I’ve struggled with in so many ways in my life. I grew up in an unhappy family. I think I was connected to my dad (my memories are foggy) but he left when I was 5. (Although I give much credit to him for nurturing our relationship as I got older). I was very connected to my grandmother, but she died when I was 9. My mother was struggling too much with herself to be connected to her children. I had a very angry step-dad. Growing up, I didn’t learn to exist happily amongst a group, to feel comfortable and at ease, or to feel a natural sense of belonging. When those things don’t come naturally to you in childhood, you have to build the skills one-by-one as an adult, and it can be very challenging! I’ve struggled with how to be in a family. I love my husband and children so much, and yet it hasn’t come naturally to know how to be with them. To be unguarded and at ease, to be safe and cozy. It’s something I actively practice to this day. Ten years ago, I gathered four lovely women to be my companions in starting Cotton+Steel, and I love them dearly, and yet it hasn’t always come naturally to know how to be with them either. It’s something that I continuously work at. I leave myself little notes that say “give compliments” and “give encouragement” and I tell myself to reach out and share when I’m struggling, or when something really great happens. And each time I feel I’ve accomplished moments of true connection (which, to my great luck, have been innumerous), it’s a tiny victory, and it means the world. So here I am, hoping to be my weird amoeba-shaped self, and to connect in some way with all of you. Thank you for being here, and for supporting us all of these years. |
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One more thing! As promised, I’ve been working on some new art prints and stickers for all of you. My pop up shop will be open until September 22, and you’re hearing about it here first! You will have first dibs on all the products before I announce the shop on Instagram next week. Go to www.melodymiller.net to see what’s new! |
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from Rashida's shop before they're all gone! |
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