Hi First name / friend
Now that the December, “25 Days of Minis Show” is over, and with it, all the hustle and bustle of the holidays, I finally have time to write an email newsletter. I figured the start of a new year is as good a time as any to re-introduce myself.  
Normally, when someone says, “Tell me about yourself”, my first instinct is to run so fast, I leave a me-shaped hole in the nearest wall. But, since I have a lot of new subscribers here, I thought I should give it a whirl.
I’m calling this Newsletter Segment:
“Everything you ever wanted to know about the artist, 
but the artist was unwilling to tell you.”
(I’m still workshopping this).
My name is Karen McCool. And I know what you’re thinking: “Is that really her name?” And it is. Apparently, my parents wanted me to grow up to be an internet meme. Oof, I do hate that meme. I don’t care what the internet has told you, we Karen’s are a a f*ckn’ delight! (And if you don’t cut that sh*t out, we’ll be speaking to your manager).*see footnote
No, I’m kidding …  I know you’re actually wondering about my last name being McCool. I’ve been asked if that’s a made-up name, but it’s not. It’s real. I took my husband’s name when we got married. Not because I hated my maiden name (It is Pucci, and I don’t hate it), but because his last name is McCool, and it would have been a crime not to use it.  
But now that you’ve gotten me started … “Karens” are a part of Generation X. We grew up in a lawless time (the 70s) when no one wore bike helmets, and we drove Fords with exploding gas tanks. We had no internet, and also, “The Jetsons” promised us flying cars and robot maids, so excuse us if we drink a lot and consider “Die Hard” to be a Christmas movie.
Now for a picture of me … that’s me in the mighty mouse t-shirt, (below) which is as close to sharing a picture of me as you will get …  but if you squint, add fifty years and about ***something-something*** pounds, I still look exactly like this:
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Well, that’s all for this installment of
 “Everything you ever wanted to know about the artist, but the artist was unwilling to tell you.” 
(Any better the second time? No. You're right. It's awful. I'm open to suggestions).
Before I go, here’s a quick peek at my easel. This is a painting for an upcoming show at “The Peninsula Gallery" in Lewes, DE (more info to come):
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Title: “The Deep End'”  |   36"x60"  |  Oil on canvas.

Oh, one last thing, to all the new subscribers from Instagram (And to those who don’t follow me on Instagram, why aren’t you following me on Instagram?), I picked a new subscriber to send that painting to, and I thank you all so much for being here! There will be more give-aways coming up! 
To those people who aren’t following me on Instagram and have no idea what I’m talking about (Again: Why aren’t you following me on Instagram?) in case you’re feeling left out, I have another give-away planned, exclusively for my email subscribers … keep an eye on your inbox.
We’re all in this together,
*footnote: And with that opening, you’ve learned another little tidbit about me: I curse more than Leonardo DiCaprio’s character in “The Wolf of Wall Street”. I can’t help it. I’m part eye-talian. But if a little salty language makes you want to unsubscribe … you did see that part about me having a give-away coming up, right?