Lately life has felt a bit like ‘a test’.
As if I am being filmed on one of those episodes of ‘punk’d’ and the audience is waiting to see how I am going to react. It’s my own movie though, so I understand that it’s up to me in terms of my response. That’s the thing about free will, if you don’t like the movie that’s playing, you can choose another one. This reminds me of one of my favorite quotes by Viktor Frankl, ‘Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom’.

 

My son, Smith, recently turned 6 and yes, I can believe it!

I have gratefully been more present these last 6 years than any other time. 
What a brilliant age, 6.
Can you recall your six year old self?
I was introverted and inquisitive.

I could sit still and observe others for hours.
The Ocean was fascinating to me and still is. 

Incessant waves crashing over and over and over again on the surface and yet, the further down you go, the darker it becomes and silence takes over.

There is so much richness to learn from her.

 

The Moon was in Cancer when Smith was born. 

This is known as a Moon in Domicile- The Queen on her Thrown if you will. A natural placement as the Moon represents The Mother and Cancer, ironically, is the wise protector. 

 

There is a symbiotic relationship between the ocean and the Moon. 

Each Moon phase changes the currents on the surface of the ocean. 

And we can only see the Moon because of the Sun:

The side of the Earth or Moon facing the Sun is well lit;

While the side facing away from the Sun is the shadow. 

Sit with this for a moment…
 

After my last newsletter, the outpouring of responses was enormous from emails, texts, voice messages to letters, flowers, gifts, oh my! 

 

‘Cancer’ has a way of taking center stage and the rabbit holes of our minds can turn dark fast. Sympathy poured in and I thought, how delightful it is to be fed. But then I questioned whether sharing my news added to the list of ‘bad news’ someone already is consuming. This would not be my intention...

 

What if everything happening right now was a reflection of what we have been thinking, feeling and holding onto for years? Would you believe you are this powerful or more poignantly, unaware of how powerful you are?

We create the energy that surrounds us by perpetuating whatever thought continues just like the incessant waves crashing. But what’s below?

When we change the focus and sustain what we find, this is when we enter the new movie.

What is the thought and behavior that needs an adjustment right now?

What’s possible isn't really a question of circumstance, it becomes more a question of whether what’s possible is based on probability of the past or pure potential for the future.

Old stories hold space and don’t allow for growth and new things to happen.
What is the story we tell about ourselves?

We will all go through things while here on Earth at school.
If anything, sharing with my community was an opportunity for you to hear from me and know the tone I am taking while embarking on yet another journey. I am practicing presence through observation: being, seeing, feeling, hearing, tasting and moving as the light that we all are, not in fear, rather in abundance to what I have right now, which is life. And still, it’s true, there are days I shine brighter than other days and allow myself to retreat to full on emotional storms. It’s all welcome during this season.
 

We are all part of this cosmic plan. As Ram Dass said, ‘I can do nothing for you but work on myself...you can do nothing for me but work on yourself‘. And in doing so, we become whole, like a giant jigsaw puzzle- every piece matters.

When we own our stories, we allow others to share theirs. My story is not sad; It’s deliberate, intentional and hopefully inspiring. Life is happening for us not to us. I have an attitude that I get to do this.

And so, I will sign off by expressing how much I cherish every single response to anything I ever write. Part of my story is becoming a writer.

I really love to write.

Thank you for your beautiful messages; from this, I shine brighter and spread the light of love, compassion and community on behalf of ‘us’ to others.

And like the ocean, ‘the news’ is a bit like crashing waves on the surface, but deep down I am at peace and know I will be fine.

Oh, and one fun fact: Our DNA is made up of carbon, oxygen, nitrogen and phosphorus which are all made by stars and get released into the atmosphere when a star dies, which is ironically the time the star becomes light and we see it in the night sky. This means, not only are we made of start dust, but our light becomes brighter when we allow the death of what's old to become new. 

And so I say, Namaste; the highest divine light within me honors and bows to the highest divine light within you.