It isn't about being selfish or saying no to everything—it is about prioritizing your well-being so you can show up as your best self in every part of your life.
In the last 4 years, I’ve been more intentional about setting them. I often joke with people and say that it is my 6th love language.
Why?
It is how I manage my mental health. It is how I protect my energy. It is how I take care of me.
Who do I set boundaries with?
I set boundaries with friends. I set boundaries with family. I set boundaries with clients. I set boundaries with my team. I set boundaries with my hubby. I set boundaries with MYSELF.
And guess what?
Ya girl is STILL working on it (I’m an empath - it’s hard out here 😩)
Let's Talk About Setting Boundaries At Work…
You spend a large chunk of our life at work, so it's important you create a healthy balance that allows you to thrive without burning out. My advice?
Protect your time, boo.
Your time is precious, so don't be afraid to guard it…fiercely. Whether it's setting limits on meeting times, carving out uninterrupted work hours, sharing your availability, or getting clarity tasks to be prioritized – be sure to set boundaries that will allow you to perform your best.
Here are some examples:
Setting Communication Expectations: "Hey team, I'm excited to dive into this project with you all! Just a heads up though, I'm carving out some 'focus time' during the day to really nail down my tasks. I won't be as responsive on the Slack group chat, but please feel free to ping me directly if something is urgent.
Managing Workload: "Morning [Manager], hope you're doing well! I'm 100% on board with this new project, but I've got a bunch on my plate. Mind if we have a quick chat about prioritizing tasks? I want make sure I'm giving everything the attention it deserves without spreading myself too thin."
Getting Time Back: "Hi [Coworker], hope your day's off to a good start! I have a few deliverables due tomorrow and realize I need some uninterrupted blocks of time to make it happen. Can we move our catch-up meeting to later this week? I'd appreciate it big time!"
Clarifying Availability: “Hi team, I'm making a conscious effort to prioritize my personal time outside of work hours. Unless it's super urgent, I'll be offline and unplugged after [insert end time]. I'll be sure to address anything sent after this time first thing in the morning.
Let's Talk About Setting Boundaries At Home
Your personal life is just as important as your professional one, so don't forget to set boundaries that nurture your relationships, well-being, and happiness.
Prioritize self-care, boo.
Remember that you can't pour from an empty cup, so be sure to make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine. Set boundaries that will allow you to pause, recharge, reduce stress, and do things that give you energy.
Here are some examples:
Setting boundaries with family: "Hey guys, I need some space to unwind after work. Can we hold off on family discussions until after dinner today? I've had a hectic day, and I'd really appreciate some quiet time to decompress before diving into anything else. Once I've had a chance to recharge, I'll be more than ready to catch up and chat with everyone."
Setting boundaries with friends:"Hey boo! I'm trying to cut back on late-night calls. Can we catch up during the day instead? I've been finding it hard to wind down in the evenings lately, and I think having our chats during the day would be more beneficial for both of us. Plus, it gives us a chance to enjoy our conversations without feeling rushed :)
Setting boundaries with your partner: "Hey babe, I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with all the household responsibilities lately. Can we sit down and discuss how we can divide them more evenly? I want us both to feel supported and appreciated in our relationship, and I think finding a better balance in our chores could really help with that."
Setting boundaries with your kids: Hey munchkin, I love our playtime, but Mom/Dad needs a break to finish some chores. How about we have a little break, and then we can dive back into our fun activities?"
MY FINAL THOUGHTS…
Setting boundaries isn't always easy, and it may take some trial and error to find what works best for you. But remember, you're worth it, and your well-being is non-negotiable.
Here are a few reminders if you are working on boundary setting, too:
It’s okay to say ‘NO’.
It’s not your job to fix others.
Prioritizing self care is not selfish.
People will disagree with you. That is OK.
Express your needs and be honest.
Answer that email tomorrow. It can wait.
Create distance from toxic relationships.
Tell them ‘right now is not a good time.’
A BOOK I LOVE…
A RETREAT FOR YOU…
Have a great week!
Ariel Belgrave, CPT
Certified Health & Fitness Coach
Corporate Wellness Strategist
Board Member, Women's Health Mag
Under Armour Athlete
P.S. I encourage you to forward this email to someone who could use this wisdom (sharing is caring!)
