This excerpt on anger comes from the forthcoming book Soul Detective.
“As I delved deeper into my introspection, I unearthed a profound realization: anger isn't synonymous with uncontrolled rage; it doesn't necessarily need to be loud or explosive. Anger can be spoken quietly yet firm like Mother Theresa did in a documentary. She was talking with two men whose countries were warring and would not cease fire for her to pick up the dead and help the wounded. Paraphrasing her words: “Yes, you will.” She spoke softly then got up and proceeded to her calling, helping the wounded. The two men were forced into a cease fire without a raised voice.
My anger had shattered the armor and like a butterfly, I left my cocoon. Some of it fell away in moments of standing my ground, most often to help others. I needed to care about my own feelings as much as I did for the rest of the world, instead of being the only one on the seesaw.”
If anger is something you are uncomfortable with, here are some ideas:
1. Imagine yourself in a calm, meditative state, visualizing someone who makes you uncomfortable. Picture yourself telling them what makes you uncomfortable, saying something like, "I am angry at what you did," and then clearly stating the action that upset you. Stay quiet and wait until you feel relief from facing this fear.
2. Affirm that you are allowed to judge an upsetting action, not the soul of the person. If you are angry at yourself, follow the same process. Judge the action, not yourself as a soul, so you can decide what needs to change. Commit to taking small steps to change what makes you uncomfortable about yourself.
3. Remember, everything starts within us. You may want to journal about what you learned from those around you when you were young regarding anger or rage. Recognize the pattern to understand that you simply absorbed others' beliefs. As an adult, you no longer need to follow those patterns. When you fully accept yourself, your beautiful wings are wide open.
