Excerpt from Soul Detective Chapter 4
My daughter attended a Montessori school in Peekskill, New York, for one year, during which her father kindly covered the tuition. She thrived under the care of her two exceptional teachers, whom she deeply adored. Recognizing my eagerness to be involved, they generously invited me to volunteer with the children; an opportunity I gladly embraced. One day, as I picked up my daughter, one of her teachers asked me, “How did you find the courage to marry again?”
My reply was, “It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”
Reflecting on this during my drive home, I felt dissatisfied with my response and engaged in a mental dialogue with her, imagining a more thoughtful conversation. I shared insights into her situation, drawing parallels with my own experiences, including the fears and hopes that accompany new beginnings.
Upon arriving home, I penned this imagined conversation in my journal and proceeded with the evening’s routine. My journal entry was as close to what I was imagining in my mind’s conversation as I
could make it.
This is what I wrote:
I know it sounds difficult to love again. However, I know that you’re dating a wonderful human being. Remember that your husband, whom you are now divorced from, was terrified of living and terrified of dying. He knew that he could not love anybody right now, most of all himself. And that’s something you understood because his sister had died when she was eight years old. The man you are dating now has no fear of living or sharing his feelings. He loves you and your children and wants to marry you. He’s not afraid of dying, and he loves adventure.
After tucking my children into bed, I summoned the courage to call the teacher and share my thoughts.
What do you think happened? What did it teach me?
