Issue 31: On What's Modern, Finding Hope, and Not Overreacting
01. Intuition
Modern, René Magritte (1923)
What detail surprises you in this painting?
Julie from Columbus noticed that the head in the car window is the same shape as the head in the foreground. At first she thought it was intended to be a reflection, but the more she looked, the less she felt like it was.
Now I can't unsee how they are twinned.
Do you see something surprising?
Congrats, you've just sharpened your ability to identify emerging possibilities.
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Roy uses a narrative invention that helps your mind find hope in moments of despair.
Two simple sentences, one mind-altering sleight of hand.
Roy tells us the new world isn't yet here, but she can hear her breathing. This near-paradox —not actually here, but here enough to sense—opens your mind to simultaneous opposing truths. The effect is mystical, helping your brain feel that an alternate reality is equally plausible as the one you're struggling in.
Why do we do this exercise?
So you get better at identifying what you feel and why.
So we have a reference library of literary works to help you alleviate hard feelings when they hit and build on positive ones.
Learn more about the narrative technique that banishes despair and its relationship to the psychedelic in chapter 9 of Wonderworks.
Imagine it: You're married to a man who goes out of his way to make you feel loved. You're generally more reserved, but on the first day of your lake vacation, the two of you sneak out of the house to share an early morning swim and you feel compelled to tell him how you feel. Twice, you make yourself vulnerable, expressing how grateful you are to have this time with him.
If you chose Option C, you have the kind of commonsense that might make you a world-renowned expert on vulnerability.
Commonsense is your ability to match the newness of your plan to the newness of your environment.
In Brené Brown's case, her first impulse was to overreact. As she describes in her book, Rising Strong, Brown has to talk herself out of wallowing in shame about how she might look in her speedo and catastrophizing, among other things, the end of their 25-year marriage, AKA Option B.
The situation, while uncomfortable, wasn't that dire.
Brown acts on Option C, sharing her feelings and asking about his. Only then does she learn what her panicked mind wouldn't allow her to imagine: her husband's behavior has absolutely nothing to do with her.
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