Hi Muses!
From the last newsletter until now, guess what? My life has been flipped and turned upside down. 😏 Baby girl Harmony, was born Sept. 27th and since then, it's been a whirlwind of stepping fully into this role as mommy.
A quick note on terminology:
- postpartum is the time after birth, it doesn't mean depression.
- the 4th trimester (tri 4) = the 3 months after delivery
The changes in tri 4 completely took me by surprise and they continue to impact every aspect of my wellbeing. The biggest changes have been
1. Physical, of course. I was cleared to exercise as of last week 🙂 which is great, but my body is not ready at all. So pole, climbing and lifting are still on hold until I feel like I'm ready. What is 6 weeks when you push out a baby 🙋🏽♀️ or have a c-section? It's no time. I've been stretching, walking and doing some light core work
2. Emotional/mental- The changes in my hormones in conjunction with everything I'm learning, lack of sleep and the invisible load of motherhood... It takes a toll. It's been hard even with all the support I have. I decided to go back to therapy with someone who has a postpartum focus to help me sort through what I'm feeling.
3. Digital- my screen time has been higher than *ever* in life. I bought a Kindle so I can read when she's contact napping or feeding. (I'm not counting the kindle as a screen.) I also delete IG for days at a time because I'd doom scroll during those 2am pump/feeding sessions. Lastly, I deleted the screen time app off my phone so I wouldn't obsess over my increased screen time.
3. Occupational- I've always read that having children hinders career mobility for women. In Dec. 2023 I had ideas and plans for growing the fitness aspect of museologie in 2024. Now, I'm not sure what the future looks like anymore. For my foundation job, I'll be going back in Jan. after maternity leave. It feels impossible to have all these roles and do them well. Do I stop training? I'm not sure--Something else to figure out.
4. Financial- Babies are expensive and we were super blessed with gifts from our village and support systems. Now I need a car, I need to pay down some debt (thanks US healthcare system) and start seriously saving for my IRA. It's always something 😩
With all that being said, I've come to appreciate so many small things. The first time I got out the house, the fresh air felt SO GOOD (and this was fresh city air- not the countryside of Vermont.) One morning, I saw the sun rising and felt an abundance of gratitude. It was like a sign to remember all the good things going on: My family has cooked dinner for us, my mom comes over to give me time to myself, straighten up the house and watch Harmony. My friends check in, I have paid maternity leave, Harmony is very happy and healthy. I have a car, house, food… there's so much that going great.
Despite all the changes that come with pregnancy and postpartum, my community and of course seeing Harmony's face and daily growth has helped when I get exhausted, frustrated and uncertain. Being in this role has been life changing and it is now intricately part of my wellness journey.
Can't wait to keep you all updated and add this part of this new chapter.
Moms, tap in: How were you first few months? Dads, how were they for you? What do you wish you knew or advice to pass to me?
💚 Jordan
