As we are navigating this time of new elections and the approaching holiday season, we hear a lot about “self-care.” In fact, the term is so overused that I can imagine many of us roll our eyes a little when we hear about it. Sometimes we confuse self-care with escaping responsibilities – i.e., a glass of wine (or two or three), scrolling on the phone (for hours), taking a bath (or not – it’s taking too long to fill the tub and then clean it), or simply avoiding anything that resembles work. However, as I found from my own experience, self-care doesn’t mean much if it is not done regularly and purposefully. As such, some things that are done intentionally to better ourselves personally and professionally can be considered self-care. For example, many of us have experienced this when we attended the Colorado Counseling Association (CCA) Conference in August in Keystone. While it wasn’t really like going on vacation, it felt rejuvenating and refreshing when we spent time with other professionals, learning and sharing on topics that are important to our field.
Humans have always been on the lookout for ways to ease up their work. We look to find tools that will enhance or simplify our work, in some cases even replacing the human factor. As a counselor educator, I have been confronted recently with the excessive use of artificial intelligence (AI) by graduate students in completing their work. In addition, I just heard of a new system that is used to “listen in” to counseling sessions and write the progress notes for the practitioner. I’ve even had a discussion recently with someone arguing that there could be a possibility in the near future that an AI entity (with a computer-generated human face) may be used to conduct counseling with clients, basically without the client even knowing that they are working with AI. While there are a lot of ethical and legal implications connected to this possibility, I took a moment to think about that. How are we different than an AI surrogate? I thought of the four clients I saw that day. Two of them had important break throughs and this was in part because I picked up on something they said that sounded a bit different than what they said before. Then I was able to help them find the value in it and how it applied to their daily living. The other two had been making consistent progress towards their goal, and I was there to validate, reflect, and affirm their progress. As I was thinking about my interactions with these clients, I became very convinced that AI can never do what human counselors do. We know that what is healing in counseling is the therapeutic connection with another human being (Hansen, 2016).
In my talks with my supervisees and students, sometimes I hear them say that they feel like they didn’t do much, but the clients seem to make significant progress. Then I ask them: When, in your typical day or week, or even month does someone take 50 or 60 minutes to focus just on you? To talk about what is important to you, to help you figure something out, without imposing their beliefs and emotions, without wanting or needing anything from you? Usually the answer to that is, never. We all just get that from our own counselor or therapist (if we have one). Sometimes I give that level of focused attention to my own children, but likely not that sustained. Over the years, I’ve had clients who thought I would make a good friend to them. I had to remind them that (in addition to ethical issues) I’m not like this with my friends. In a real friendship, I actually want something in return. A friendship is a relationship in which both parties benefit from emotional support. After I listen to my friends, I also want a time to talk and have them listen. Usually when I bring that reality in, my clients understand that how I show up in the counseling room can be very different than how I show up as a friend. This is not news to any of us. It goes to show that our role in the counseling room is very unique and it doesn’t really happen in any other interactions. Because of this, we need to get a chance to protect our energy and personal resources. As Yalom (2009) says, the best tool we have in our profession is ourselves, our own person, and that needs to be protected, replenished, and grown.
In my previous contribution to the CCA Newsletter in July, I mentioned that it is important for us as professionals to show up (Holstun, 2024). I would like to add that, after showing up, one of the best ways of protecting our own resources is to stay connected to each other by sharing. You might wonder how does that help us? After all, it is still more emotional or personal energy from us. As I mentioned before, being intentional matters. A professional conference is an event where we both share and also take in. Many of us felt energized after attending, despite the effort of getting there, rescheduling clients, and managing personal issues. We as counselors do a lot of important and wonderful things, however many of us practice in isolation, and we don’t have anyone with whom to share what we do.
I am hoping that you have enjoyed the content of the CCA Newsletters coming your way every month, because I would like invite you to share by contributing to it. Think about all the wonderful things that you do with your clients – you know, those things that make you think, “AI could never replace that.” And think about how it would feel to share those experiences with other counselors in the State of Colorado. Wouldn’t that be affirming and refreshing? You might think, “oh, I haven’t written anything other than case notes since grad school.” Not to worry. We will pair you up with a more experienced writer. All you need to do is come up with a topic you want to share. We are particularly interested in clinical cases, clinical techniques or interventions, or other practical aspects that you find useful in your practice. Then we will connect you with someone who can help you develop that. You are in charge of the content; the help is only for writing. If you are interested, please email the CCA at newsletter@coloradocounselingassociation.org.
Another opportunity to share is to connect with the Journal of Humanistic Counseling (JHC). If you identify as a humanistic counselor (and many of us do), the JHC is inviting practitioners to share pragmatic case studies and practice ideas that can be published in the journal. For more information about the Publication Pathways for the Journal of Humanistic Counseling, please visit
I invite you to check out both opportunities, and let us know how we can help. At the very least, you can propose a topic that you would like to see covered in the newsletter. You don’t need to commit to write – we’ll find someone to write about it. But now that you have thought about it, and now that you have help, wouldn’t it make sense for you to take that next step and share?
If writing is still not an appealing thought, please consider submitting a proposal for our 2025 Annual Conference, August 20-22 in Keystone. The link will open on December 1 and proposals will be accepted until January 31, 2025. You will be notified about your proposal in March, 2025.
Even if you choose not to use these opportunities, I hope you will consider at least sharing with a colleague about some of the successes or challenges you experience with your clients. And while you are at it, please share the CCA benefits and opportunities so that more practitioners in Colorado can benefit from them. Best wishes for a wonderful season of self-caring through sharing!
References
Hansen, J. T. (2016). Meaning systems and mental health culture. Lexington Books.
Holstun, V. P. (July, 2024). Showing up to make a difference. Colorado Counseling Association
Newsletter.
Yalom, I. (2007). The gift of therapy. HarperPerennial.
