In the 1970s, Roy Frumkes, through a mutual friend, contacted me. He came to my home in Peekskill, NY to introduce another friend. We talked about a film he was completing called Burt's Bikers. The film documented Burt Raphael's innovative approach to helping students with special needs integrate into mainstream society through the simple yet transformative act of learning to ride bicycles. Burt's belief that an unlimited mindset could lead to extraordinary outcomes expanded the children's confidence in navigating a chaotic world. Roy wanted me to meet the woman who inspired the film—Burt's daughter, Sooki Raphael. Her father had died recently and this was Sooki’s way of paying homage to his legacy.
That day, I had the privilege of meeting one of the most uniquely spiritual, gifted, and loving people I've ever known. Sooki's bright smile radiated joy, and her energy was infectious. She had a remarkable gift for opening doors—figuratively and literally—broader and more significant than most people ever dared. It was as though she carried light and possibility wherever she went.
Sooki and I quickly became close friends. One day, she called and asked if I could come to her apartment in Park Slope, Brooklyn. Sitting together on her bed, she shared exciting news: "I met a man in California who told me he'd been waiting for me his whole life. We're getting married, and I want you to perform the wedding."
Stunned, I replied, "Perform the wedding? I've never done anything like that before. What would you want me to do?" Without hesitation, Sooki reminded me, "You're a minister, so you can perform it." Her confidence in me was unwavering, and my lack of experience didn't faze her.
Months later, in the backyard of her mother's home in Port Chester, New York, I officiated my very first wedding. Instead of a traditional engagement ring, Sooki had asked for a baby cockatiel, which perched on my shoulder throughout the ceremony. That day, my unexpected journey as a wedding officiant began.
Sooki's wedding was filled with love and magic, and her guests felt it, too. After the ceremony, one couple approached me and asked if I would also officiate their wedding. I call it "the Sooki Touch"—her ability to inspire others to believe in their gifts and use them to create joyful, magical experiences.
Over the years, I've officiated weddings nationwide—in Colorado, Pennsylvania, Delaware, Florida, New York City, and beyond. Thousands of weddings later, I finally retired from this meaningful work in 2018. Each wedding was a reminder of the power of connection, belief, and love.
Sooki's influence extended far beyond my life. Have you heard of the author Ann Patchett or the actor Tom Hanks? Sooki worked as Tom Hanks's PA (personal assistant) for many years, and her friendship with Ann Patchett inspired the opening story of Patchett's book These Precious Days. Their connection is beautifully described in this article. Sooki's gifts, like a beacon of light, brought joy and transformation to everyone she touched.
Questions for Reflection:
Where in your life could you embrace an unlimited mindset to unlock new possibilities?
Have you ever had someone see potential in you that you didn't see in yourself? How did it change your path?
What gifts might you be hiding that could bring joy and transformation to others?
Conclusion:
Sooki's life and influence remind us that we can uncover hidden talents, inspire others, and create extraordinary experiences. With an open heart and a willingness to explore, new and exciting paths await. Embracing an unlimited mindset is the key to unlocking these possibilities. What will you discover when you embrace your own 'Sooki Touch'?
