You're attending a major tech conference, and the keynote is about to begin.
The CEO steps up and says:
“I started this company 30 years ago with just three employees...”
And the audience leans in.
Why?
Because stories — especially personal ones — pull us in.
They make us care. They give us a reason to listen.
But here’s the twist:
The best personal stories don’t just share information — they reflect something to the audience.
They say, “Here’s my story… and here’s what it means for you.”
This is one of the most powerful lessons in speaking:
Make your message personal but always make it about them.
It’s not that personal stories are the problem — they’re the magic.
The problem is when speakers tell stories that don’t connect to the audience’s world.
Let’s look at an example:
Speaker-Centered Opening:
“I’m excited to share my thoughts on leadership with you today.”
Audience-Centered (Story-Driven) Opening:
“20 years ago, I was promoted to lead a team for the first time — and I almost quit within a week. The excitement of the promotion quickly gave way to a sinking feeling of being overwhelmed. I was terrified of letting my team down and questioned whether I was truly cut out for leadership.
But I didn't quit. I sought guidance…etc. Here’s what I wish I knew then… and what I think every new leader should know now.”
Same speaker. Same topic. But one makes the audience feel something.
Here’s another example:
Speaker-Centered Pitch:
“I created this program to share what I’ve learned about public speaking.”
Audience-Centered Pitch:
You know that moment, when you're caught off guard, asked to speak unexpectedly in a meeting or interview, and felt your heart race, your mind go blank? I've been there too - feeling unprepared and exposed…and frankly, it's embarrassing.
This program is designed for moments like those—to equip you with the tools to speak confidently and clearly, even under pressure.
The difference?
One is about the speaker.
The other is about the audience’s benefit.
Try This Before Your Next Talk:
- Write out the first 3–5 lines of your speech or pitch.
- Highlight every “I,” “me,” or “my.”
- Flip it — focus on the audience’s needs, goals, or dreams.
Bonus tip: If you’re telling a personal story, ask yourself:
“What does this show or offer the audience?”
When you align your story with their world, your message becomes magnetic.
Want to improve your speaking? Visit
www.speaktopia.com for workshops, coaching, and training programs that will help you speak with confidence and real impact.
Have a question? Just hit reply — I’d love to hear from you.
Happy Speaking!
Lisa Kleiman
Owner and Coach, Speaktopia
www.speaktopia.com
