Back in 2014, I delivered Coaching Skills for Leaders for the first time as a two-day face-to-face course in Jakarta. Since then, it has evolved—first into a live virtual program during COVID, then back into a refreshed in-person format. And now, I'm excited to share that it’s been fully re-imagined as a flexible, self-paced online course. It's been a work of passion and a steady theme through my own growth and my business.

This newly launched version is designed to fit your schedule while retaining all the practical, leader-focused tools that have made it one of my most popular offerings.

To celebrate the launch, I’m offering 50% off to the first 25 subscribers. I’d love to hear what you think of the new format.

Use the coupon code: RELAUNCH50 at checkout

 

It can feel like an interruption. Even a betrayal of the unspoken order that says “you lead, I follow.” But what if it is a gift?

 

When a subordinate offers unsolicited feedback, they are doing more than naming a flaw. They are testing the relationship. Testing whether this space between you and them is one in which honesty can live without punishment. Whether you want to grow or just appear complete.

 

 

It’s the most common question I hear in coaching. And yet smart, experienced, driven professionals still stumble over it.

 

My challenge to them:
You’re not stuck because you don’t know what you want.
You’re stuck because you’ve made the question too safe.

 

We treat “What do I want to do next?” like a riddle to be solved.
We overthink, over-research, and over-consume TED Talks hoping for clarity to arrive.

But that question is a decoy.
It keeps you in your head, safe from action, immune to risk, and protected from judgment.
It invites introspection when what you actually need is experimentation.

And most dangerously, it assumes there’s a right answer out there just waiting to be uncovered.

There isn’t.

 

In 2010, I picked up a book from the bargain table at Borders in Wheelock Place, Singapore: Relational Coaching by Erik de Haan. At the time, I had no idea it would signal the start of my coaching journey. 

What struck me immediately was the blend of reflective practice and rigorous evidence. De Haan writes with clarity, humility, and depth, grounding coaching in both the interpersonal dynamic and the wider psychological landscape. It introduced me to the concept that coaching is not just a method, it’s a relationship. And that relationship is the foundation of transformation.

Relational Coaching reframed how I approached my work. It challenged me to step beyond tools and models, and to focus on “how I am with the client”, not just what I do with them. It gave language and legitimacy to the felt sense of coaching encounters, and offered a framework backed by research that respected the complexity of real human change.

Sixteen years later, my copy is now thick with post-its and pencil notes. It still sits within arm’s reach of my desk.

 

The post first in the series about books that made me the coach I am is "Where Were All the Coaches When the Banks Went Down?"

If you received this email from a friend, and would like to subscribe, please visit my website