And one of the biggest barriers to change? 

 

The negative stories we tell ourselves about who we are and what we are capable of. I call this running ticker tape of inner critic put-downs our Inner Critic Commentary, and a big part of my work is inviting clients to objectively analyse and interrogate it. 

 

In a recent session someone posed a question: Is this story about myself untrue and wrong, and therefore I need to change it OR is it actually true and therefore I need to accept it?

 

While I can’t share their specific story, I can share an example that illuminates why this question was so powerful… Let’s say the story you’re telling yourself is “I’m too sensitive.” 

 

The answer to the question Is this story true or untrue is that it's both - it's true AND untrue.

 

The part that is true is “SENSITIVE” and the part that is untrue is “TOO”.

 

The untruth is within the value judgement applied to Sensitive by using the word Too. What needs to be rewritten here are all of the stories that tell us sensitive is weak and fragile; sensitive is the opposite of strength and power.

 

What if instead of I’m too sensitive we said I AM SENSITIVE. 

 

And because I’m sensitive I can …  [now insert all the incredible things that being deeply perceptive, empathetic and emotionally resonant allows you see and do, that insensitivity and indifference misses every time].

Challenging old stories isn’t about denying who we are, it’s about deeply accepting and owning who we are. 

 

It’s about denying the reductive meanings and value judgements that other people, society (and ourselves) apply to our truths. 

 

One of my own inner critic ‘stories’ was I'm Too Much. The untrue part is “TOO”. The true part is “MUCH”.

 

I AM MUCH. 

 

And because I am MUCH… I have boundless energy and enthusiasm for All The Things. This makes me big in some spaces. It’s also what propels me forward. It makes me able to quit things that don’t work for me and make new things that do (including careers, cities and houses).

 

These are the nuances of truth and meaning; to know the difference between what is true and what isn’t true. You don’t always need to throw out your old stories - you might just need to edit them, take out a word and shift their meaning. 

 

That's all for this month First name / Rewriter. Don't forget, if you're in a career funk I'd love to help. Want to work 1:1? Have a browse through my services. Prefer group work? Rewrite Your Career Story has cohorts starting in June and September. Email me directly with any questions by simply hitting reply. 

 

Wishing you a beautiful week ahead.