I was gifted a spa certificate to Indian Springs in Calistoga for my birthday by my incredible kitchen team. A proud moment as a kitchen mama—to receive the gift of care from those who give so much and still feel appreciated.
(The image above hangs high in the ladies locker room.)
I don’t know the women in this photo, and yet—I do.
They are us.
When I was younger, I always wanted to be older.
There were always groups of girls I admired.
In honor of Brian Wilson, I made a Summer of ’25 playlist and have been reliving my East Coast girl days—when I saw the Beach Boys live, and years later, cooked for them as a California chef. California Girls just hits differently these days…
I recently finished The First Ladies by Marie Benedict and Victoria Christopher Murray, an aptly timed gift from my mom, Cici, a lifelong educator.
It’s one of those reads that’s uncomfortable at times yet impossible to put down. In many ways it asks: Are we more comfortable with the sickness—or simply uncomfortable with the cure? Life has this way of building and building until we succumb to the weight. In many ways we are here now.
Lately, I’ve been reflecting on three themes I keep returning to:
Purpose. Partnership. Prosperity.
As women, we’re taught to be desirable without desiring.
Business often mirrors this—expected to shine but not outshine.
I once had a local woman un-invite La Saison from a Winter Market because we were “too big” and made too many of the sales the previous year.
I am young—forty-two.
Even younger when I moved to Napa Valley—just barely “legal,” as my first boss reminded me while toasting with a bottle of Taittinger at the corner booth of Bouchon. I was twenty-two, having just purchased our Pope Valley property.
“I almost feel sorry for him,” Mary says.
I wave my hand. “Don’t. Segregation needs to be seen for what it is—absurd and damaging.”
As a proud MPS 4-Year Club graduate, I’ve built beautiful bonds with women and found acceptance in many circles. And yet, I’m still caught off guard by the few who choose not to see me.
If how we live and treat others is our true testimony—
How do we measure how well we’re really doing?
Recently, my friend Sam reminded me I brought her food the night she labored with her son Francis—just weeks before I gave birth to my own, Smith.
I didn’t remember. That moment disappeared into what I call the Bermuda Triangle: postpartum + COVID. And yet, her sharing arrived at the perfect moment in time.
Lately, my sparkle has felt stretched—challenged by a small group of women.
I’ve been tempted to call them “mean moms,” but really, they’re not mean.
It’s really just one…
One who has masked her magic.
But all it ever takes is just one.
It brings me back to junior high, to the girls I longed to be like:
Tall. Healthy. Wealthy. Beautiful.
But unable to see it—and therefore unable to see it in others.
Have you noticed how often we’re conditioned to be good—to please, to yield, to soften—rather than to be whole? It’s a delicate dance—to be the “good girl,” quietly meeting others’ needs while trying not to forget our own.
I’m in a battle, not with being good or tending to myself, but with biting my tongue in the face of: Purpose. Partnership. Prosperity.
Thanks to Brené Brown, I often whisper to myself,
“Don’t puff up. Don’t shrink. Hold your sacred ground.”
Oubaitori—a Japanese word reminding us that, like cherry blossoms, we all bloom in our own time. No need to compare. Just honor the rhythm that’s uniquely yours.
One of my most radiant friends, Claire, lives this truth.
She’s wildly generous—hosting events in her white-carpeted castle without worry, even as red wine readily and rapidly recedes.
She is energetically light. Unapologetically free.
She reminds me: this is our birthright.
This is our magic.
And that’s just it—when we hide our magic, we often create more mess than mastery.
Our job isn’t just to feel good—
It’s to get good at feeling.
It’s the Golden Rule: treat others as you would like to be treated.
Jupiter—the planet of expansion, growth, and “go big or go home” energy—recently moved into Cancer, the zodiac’s Queen of feelings. This only happens every 12 years. It’s kind of a big deal. For the next year, the emotional landscape is front and center. If we lean in, we learn. If we resist, we squirm.
Growth doesn’t come from bypassing the hard stuff—it comes from feeling it fully, honoring it wisely, and letting it teach us something real.
Get good at feeling… or get ready to feel uncomfortable.
The choice is ours. Jupiter will expand whatever’s there—so let’s make sure it’s something worth growing.
This is the heart of it, isn’t it?
We’re not here just to feel good—we’re here to get good at feeling.
We are all seeking the same things: love, safety, and belonging.
So why are we hiding like children behind our mothers’ backs?
As women, especially, we need to be doing better.
Let’s not shrink from our shine or shame others for theirs.
There is no time to mask your magic.
The world needs you fully alive.
Let’s say simple hellos to those we know.
And surprise those we don’t.
Scarcity is born of fear.
Abundance comes from love.
If the sky is big enough for all the stars to shine—
it’s big enough for us too.
What you appreciate, appreciates.
This is not just a principle of abundance—it’s a practice of presence.
When we notice the good, we grow it.
This is how we build lasting community:
Not with competition, but with care.
Not by shrinking, but by sharing.
Through clear purpose, sacred partnerships, and prosperous perspective.
Unmask your magic with me. Shall we?
If you’re in the area on July 12th, we’ll be at Taste of Napa sampling all sorts of our culinary magic. Stop by and say hello.Mention this newsletter—and go home with a surprise to share.
Magically Me,
