Therefore, a Sabbath rest remains for God’s people.For the person who has entered his rest has rested from his own works, just as God did from his.
- Hebrews 4: 9-10
Almost three years ago Josh and I decided to dedicate our Sundays to a family “Sabbath”.
We didn't read The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry or any other book on the topic. We were just… tired. And our weekends (specifically Sundays) were the only time we weren't cramming two full time jobs and co-homeschooling and running the farm into every open hour of the day. Yet somehow, the weekends filled up too. We found ourselves saying “yes” to every opportunity, event, commitment and party we were invited to, entering Monday just as exhausted as we entered the weekend.
Something had to change.
At our annual end-of-year planning getaway, we decided to dedicate Sundays to something new: a complete break from all commitments, media, and travel (with a few exceptions, like family vacations or when I was flying back from a speaking engagement).
At first it was a struggle. I kept wanting to check my phone… making sure I didn't forget something for the week ahead… prepping all the homeschool content for Monday. But we designated “after dinner” for planning tasks, which meant breakfast to 6 pm was for undistracted rest.
No TV.
No phones.
No commitments.
Almost three years later, our lives are profoundly more focused, free of anxiety, and connected than they were when we had that “extra day” of time each week. Here's what I've learned from observing Sabbath as a family for so long…
First, Sabbath is a sacrifice. Now, to be clear, we don't observe it in the Jewish sense – we aren't Jewish and we aren't Torah-observant. We observe Sabbath in the historic way we see across church history, on Sunday – the Lord's Day of resurrection. This would probably look very different if we were on staff at a church and working on Sundays. We chose Sunday because it was the historic day of rest for the church, but in the days of the apostles most Gentile Christians were slaves who didn't get a day off at all! So the actual day of the week doesn't matter as much as the margin we create.
Back to sacrifice. American culture has a Kipling approach to productivity: Fill every unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run. But what if every second doesn't need to be filled? What if, instead, we gave those seconds to the Lord and trusted Him to make up the difference?
Sabbath is a tithe of time. It's a choice to give back to God a portion of the time He has given us on this earth, trusting Him to magnify the margins of what we have left. It reminds me of when Josh and I were first married and working hard to pay off his school loans. During that time we dedicated ourselves to both debt-payoff AND a monthly tithe/giving fund. We chose to continue giving 10% of our income while we paid off our debt – as a step of trust in God's abundant provision for all our needs. We paid off $30,000 in student loans in 18 months with a mixture of frugality, dedication, generosity, and God's provision.
Today, we do this with our time.
Secondly, Sabbath taught us the difference between rest and leisure. Leisure isn't always bad, but as Ecclesiastes illustrates too much leisure does not rejuvenate. Leisure includes things like watching TV, scrolling the phone, and entertainment-based activities. Rest is not the absence of people (especially children) but the presence of peace. By eliminating media from our Sundays, we learned just how much media consumption sucked our energy and left us feeling dazed instead of rested.
So what do we do instead? Here are few ways we fill the time:
attend church as a family
make brunch together or go out for breakfast
take naps
read
talk
sit outside on the patio while the kids play
as for the kids – they do things like Magnatiles, Lego, playing with our cat or baby bunnies, biking on the driveway, reading, drawing, or talking with us
We aren't legalistic about this. There have been Sundays over the last few years when we broke our media “fast” to watch House of David or an episode of the Chosen. But by far the majority of Sundays have been media-free – and amazing.
Now, almost three years into our Sabbath habit, I can't imagine living any other way. I look forward to Sundays. I know that no matter how busy or hard the week has been, there will be a moment of rest and connection for our family – a pause before the weight of ministry and home education pick back up again. A moment to breathe in the blessings of God, to sit with His goodness, to laugh among ourselves and build things and write and read and sleep.
What a gift.
What a resistance.
Sabbath will always be a choice. There will always be pressures from the world around us to choose everything but rest. I still feel that niggling prompt in my brain to do more work in the hours I'm given. I have to surrender it and trust that God's way of rest will make me MORE productive for His kingdom, not less.
Our Sabbath, most of all, reduced the anxiety I felt about completing all my responsibilities. One would think “losing” 12 hours would have the opposite effect! But intentionally giving my time to God each week has taught me a level of surrender I didn't have before. I am less worried about my lack of time, the weight of responsibility, and the opinions of others than I was when I worked in every extra minute. Peace and rest are available this side of heaven – the gift is realized in resistance to cultural expectation.
*A note about sports: Though three of my siblings played sports through high school (one in college, at a Division 1 school), and I was in equestrian sports for my high school and college career – as for us, our family has chosen to decline any sports commitments that include games or practices on Sundays. We also don't watch sports on Sundays. If sports are a big part of your family culture, it's worth evaluating 1) whether they have taken precedent over the spiritual life of your family and 2) if there is another day you can dedicate to Sabbath. It speaks volumes to be part of a family who can participate in sports while keeping church attendance + rest sacred! Eric Liddell is one athlete worth reading about on this topic.
