العربي في الأسفل 👇👇👇
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Dear Sunday Sparkers,
 
Are you asking weak questions?
 
This is not an email to teach you the art of asking questions in meetings.
 
This is an email to invite you to ask yourself powerful questions.
 
Weak questions are not about grammar or prose.
 
Weak questions are those that leave you worse off after asking them. They sap your energy and drain your motivation.
 
Here are examples of weak questions:
 
Why isn't it easier?
Why does this bad thing always happen to me?
Why does this good thing never happen to me?
Why should it be this hard?
Why aren’t my days smoother?
Why isn’t my bank account larger?
Why are my arms flapping when I am whisking eggs?
Why are these lines showing up on my forehead?
Why do I have to have difficult conversations?
Why am I in this WhatsApp group?
Why do I not stand for myself right away?

 We think these questions all the time, but what we don’t realize is that by thinking them, we are giving a task to our mind to search and come back with answers. I learned from the book Insight by Tasha Eurich and shared here that the brain does not care what the statement is after why. It will deem it a fact, look for evidence for it, and believe me, it will find it! 
 
How to ask powerful questions
 
I watched this reel yesterday that reminded me of this inspiring idea.
 
ٍSo, let’s attempt to flip those questions to more powerful ones, I asked AI to help me turn around these questions using How and What
 
Why isn't it easier? →
How can I make this easier for myself next time?
Why does this bad thing always happen to me? →
What patterns can I notice here, and how can I respond differently next time?
Why does this good thing never happen to me? →
What can I do to create the conditions for this good thing to happen in my life?
How can I invite more of this kind of experience into my life?
Why should it be this hard? →
How can I make this process easier or lighter for myself?
Why aren’t my days smoother? →
What small changes could I make to create more ease in my day?
Why isn’t my bank account larger? →
What steps can I take to grow my income or manage my money more intentionally?
Why are my arms flapping when I am whisking eggs? →
What exercises or habits can I build to make my arms stronger and more toned?
Why are these lines showing up on my forehead? →
What routines or habits could I adopt to take care of my skin and express myself confidently?
Why do I have to have difficult conversations? →
How can I prepare to make this conversation as clear and compassionate as possible?
Why am I in this WhatsApp group? →
What boundaries can I set or actions can I take to protect my mental space?
Why do I not stand for myself right away? →
What support, practice, or self-talk would help me speak up sooner next time?


So, dear reader,
 
Are you minding your questions? Let today be the start.

P.S. Another good book that comes to mind Change Your Questions, Change Your Life. Check it out

 
أصدقائي

هل تطرحون أسئلة ضعيفة؟
 
هذا ليس مقالا لتعليم فنّ طرح الأسئلة في الاجتماعات، فالأسئلة الضعيفة لا تتعلق بالنحو أو الصياغة أدبية، بل هي تلك التي تترك أثرًا سلبيًا علينا بعد طرحها على أنفسنا، وتستنزف طاقتنا وتحبط عزيمتنا
 
أمثلة على الأسئلة الضعيفة
لماذا لا تكون الأمور أسهل؟
لماذا يحدث لي هذا الأمر السيّئ دائمًا؟
لماذا لا يحدث لي ما هو جيّد؟
لماذا ينبغي أن يكون كل شيء صعبًا؟
لماذا أيامي ليست أكثر سلاسة؟
لماذا لا يكبر رصيدي في البنك؟
لماذا تظهر هذه الخطوط على جبيني؟
لماذا عليّ خوض محادثات صعبة؟
لماذا أنا في هذه المجموعة على واتساب؟
لماذا لا أدافع عن نفسي فورًا؟
 
نحن نفكّر بهذه الأسئلة كثيرًا، لكن ما لا ننتبه إليه أنّنا بذلك نكلّف عقولنا بالبحث عن أجوبة، وهي ستبحث وتأتي بها لنا حتمًا. 
تعلّمت من كتاب 
Insight 
لتاشا يوريخ أنّ الدماغ لا يهتم بما يأتي بعد كلمة "لماذا"، بل يتعامل معه كحقيقة
 ويبحث عن أدلّة تثبته وأضمن لك أن يجدها 
.
كيف نطرح أسئلة قويّة
رأيت مقطع فيديو قصير بالأمس أعاد إليّ هذه الفكرة الملهمة.
 
فلنقلب هذه الأسئلة إلى أخرى أقوى باستخدام "كيف" و  ما
 
طلبت من الذكاء الاصطناعي مساعدتي وهذه النتيجة
 
لماذا لا تكون الأمور أسهل؟
 → كيف أجعلها أسهل على نفسي في المرة القادمة؟
لماذا يحدث لي هذا الأمر السيّئ دائمًا؟
 → ما الأنماط التي ألاحظها هنا، وكيف أتعامل معها بطريقة مختلفة؟
لماذا لا يحدث لي هذا الشيء الجميل؟
 → ما الذي أستطيع فعله لتهيئة الظروف لحدوث أمور جيّدة في حياتي؟
لماذا ينبغي أن يكون كل شيء صعبًا؟ 
→ كيف أجعل هذه العملية أيسر وأخفّ عليّ؟
لماذا أيامي ليست أكثر سلاسة؟ 
→ ما التغييرات الصغيرة التي يمكن أن تضيف سلاسة إلى يومي؟
لماذا لا يكبر رصيدي في البنك؟
 → ما الخطوات العملية التي تساعدني على زيادة دخلي أو إدارة مالي بوعي أكبر؟
لماذا تظهر هذه الخطوط على جبيني؟
 → ما الروتين الذي يمكن أن أتبعه للعناية ببشرتي والتعبير بثقة؟
لماذا عليّ خوض محادثات صعبة؟
 → كيف أستعدّ لأجعل المحادثة واضحة ومتعاطفة قدر الإمكان؟
لماذا أنا في هذه المجموعة على واتساب؟ 
→ ما الحدود أو القرارات التي تحمي راحتي النفسية؟
لماذا لا أدافع عن نفسي فورًا؟
 → ما الدعم أو التمرين أو الحديث الذاتي الذي يعينني على التعبير عن نفسي في الوقت المناسب؟
 
أصدقائي
هل تنتبهون إلى نوع أسئلتكم؟
لنجعل هذا اليوم هو البداية
 
ملاحظة: أنصحكم بقراءة كتاب غيّر أسئلتك، غيّر حياتك فهو من الكتب الرائعة في هذا المجال.
 

هل أحببتم القسم العربي الجديد؟ هل أستمر هكذا؟؟ رأيكم مهم جدا جدا
 
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Snapshot from my week: A week of happy occasions. That's my beautiful mama!

Here is your weekly dose of The Sunday Spark ⚡️a newsletter listing 3 sparks that I thought were worth starting your week with. 
 
2. Tsundoku, is a hopeful word for readers like me who buy books more than they can read. We are normal. There is even have a word in Japanese that describes us. Now I just need bookshelves in every room of the house just like many of my favorite authors. Speaking of books, check out Amman's International Book Fair starting later this week (September 25 to October 4, 10AM–10PM daily except Fridays from 4PM) at Mecca Mall.
 
 3. 💬 This quote is a good reminder. I was better at leaving books around for the kids, but now they are not as accessible as before:
 
"This is the trick I’ve learned with my kids: I don’t push books on them, I simply leave them lying around their spots in the house, like little book traps.”  
― Austin Kleon

P.S. Let’s chat if you are considering hiring me to guide you towards your goals and positive habits in 1-1 sessions (1 spot available for the month of September and it could be you!) or to train your team about the science of effective planning through goal setting, building habits, mastering time management for better performance and productivity, or the art of  beating burnout. 
Reply to this email, and we can start from there.

Before you go, here are some cool resources I personally use, love and recommend:
  1. PRODUCTIVITY HACK 🎯⚡Tired of opening 12 tabs every morning just to get your day started? I've been using Momentum Plus as my browser homepage - it's like having a personal assistant that shows me my mantra, weather, to-do list, and even tracks time zones so I don't accidentally wake up my friend in Australia at 3 AM. Newsletter readers get 10% off with this link.
  2. 📙 Can you believe I have been using this amazing gratitude journal since 2017? Here is a link to an Instagram highlight I did about it so you can see it from the inside. You get 10% off when you order using my code: Bardeespodcast10.

This is Sunday Spark issue #251
 
Are you seeing it for the first time? Here is the archive of the first 100 issues. 
 
Was it forwarded to you by a friend? Receive your own by subscribing here, and don't forget to thank your lovely friend for me!
 
Calendar love: This is week 39, day 264 of the year. Tomorrow we will start "100-day countdown” to the end of the year as Gretchen Rubin reminded me in her newsletter!We can make them different. We can make progress. We can start or finish things! Let's GO!

 
In case you missed these on Instagram…
 
Note: some of the links above may be affiliate links, but always keep in mind that I don't endorse anything I don't use and love myself.
 

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Amman
Amman, 11191, Jordan