Today we’ll explore another layer of Martha’s story—specifically, how pausing to sit in the presence of Jesus helps us show up better in our relationships with others.
If you didn’t catch last week’s Happy Monday, we’re revisiting Luke 10:38–42. Quick review: Jesus and His disciples are traveling toward Jerusalem and stop by Martha’s home. We read that she welcomes them with hospitality—let’s applaud her for that! But at some point, something happens:
But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. – Luke 10:40 NLT
Somewhere between Martha welcoming Jesus into her home and her complaint about Mary, she became swept up in her tasks and started to struggle.
As I reflected more on Martha’s story, I wondered—what was it like being around Martha while she was distracted? I read a quote that makes a lot of sense: “Anxiety is contagious and is transmitted through relationships.”
When we’re distracted or disconnected from God, it’s easy for worry or panic to ooze off us and affect those around us. That anxious energy becomes the air others breathe. Instead of infusing patience, love, or grace into others, we’re exhaling conflict and tension.
For example, have you noticed your adult child’s eyes dim when you criticize their decisions? Do you see your husband’s shoulders drop when you nag him day after day? Have your friends gone silent after you interrupt their ideas with your own opinions or advice?
Clearly, that’s not how we want to live. And I imagine Martha wasn’t living her best life either.
Again, I don’t want to diminish Martha’s good intentions. I’m grateful she complained and revealed her frustration! Jesus’ gentle correction was life-giving for Martha—and probably life-saving for those around her. Let’s revisit Jesus’ response:
My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. – Luke 10:41–42 NLT
Martha didn’t need to check off her list. She needed Jesus’ presence in the midst of her busyness. We do, too. When we sit with Jesus, His presence within us fills the air around us with peace.
In Jesus’ presence, there is peace in the middle of chaos.
In Jesus’ presence, we reclaim our wholeness after the world tries to tear us apart.
When we live in Jesus’ peace, we bring that peace into our relationships with others. Let me share one of my favorite phrases: non-anxious presence.
This phrase was created by a family therapist to describe the kind of calm demeanor that allows others to relax around you. People don’t like to open up when they feel like they’re on pins and needles around someone. When you’re a non-anxious presence, people let their guard down and open up with you. That’s when meaningful conversations and deep connections happen. But when we’re anxious, it’s like an invisible fence that keeps people from feeling the love we’re trying to give.
Do you need to push back against distraction and practice being a non-anxious presence? If so, I have a very practical, Scripture-centered exercise for you.
Introducing My “God-Morning/God-Night” Technique
You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you. – Isaiah 26:3 NLT
Keeping our thoughts fixed on God draws us into His presence and keeps distractions at bay. I created the “God-Morning/God-Night” technique years ago during our family’s alcohol crisis—a time when distractions felt overwhelming. I wrote five promises from God on a notecard and kept one beside my bed and another on my bathroom mirror. Each morning when I woke up, I read one card, and each night before bed, I read the other. This simple rhythm helped me block out distractions and anchor my mind in God’s truth.
If you need peace, I hope you’ll try this too. Let me know if you do!
I’D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU: If you desire to be a non-anxious presence to others, hit reply and type “non-anxious presence.” I’ll pray for you! If today’s devotion ministered to you, I’d love to hear how.
