In 1979, after moving to Budd Lake, New Jersey, I restarted my tae kwon do training. I was a green belt, and one of the coaches, Karen, was strong, brilliant, and disciplined. Her husband owned the dojo. Over the next few years, we became close friends.One day she called me: she’d quit her high-powered job after her boss ignored a no-smoking policy—while she was pregnant. I offered her a job on the spot.
One day, I heard her on the phone and saw her hang up, satisfied.
“I just placed an ad for you in the Yellow Pages to perform weddings.”
I blinked. “You what?”
She explained how her own wedding was nearly ruined the night before when her officiant backed out, and someone else fumbled through a ceremony they didn’t know. She wanted couples to have someone who truly honored their day—and she knew I did just that.
Soon, the calls started. I was booked every weekend. New Jersey, then New York City, then flying to Colorado. One wedding led to another—and then a producer from The Richard Bey Show (the original “trash TV”) called with a strange request:
“Can you do a wedding on stage? It’s not legal—just part of a surprise.”
I said yes. Sort of.
I wore my white clergy robe with black velvet trim and showed up ready to serve.
What I didn’t expect? My friend Bill—head of stage crew—looked at me and said:
“I refuse to work on this one.”
Uh-oh.
Richard introduced a weary older man and surprised him with his estranged son. The audience clapped. Then Richard added, “Your son’s getting married—right now.”
Another man joined the stage, holding the son’s hand.
The father froze. I whispered, “You must stand beside your son. This is a wedding.”
He hesitated. I gently, but firmly, repeated: “Now.”
He moved—slowly. I guided them through a short ceremony and ended with the Apache Wedding Blessing, spoken with care and intention:
“Now you will feel no cold,
For each of you will be warmth to the other…”
The kiss. The blessing. Done.
Richard stopped me before I left. “Thank you. That was kind.”
💡 Behind the Scenes Tips:
- Never underestimate small choices. One Yellow Pages ad reshaped my path for decades.
- Speak with kindness, but act with strength. I learned to guide gently—but without apology.
- You can calm chaos with presence. Even when the show goes off-script.
🔁 Analogy Time:
Life is like officiating a live wedding on surprise TV: You don’t control the guests, the timing, or the script. But you do control how you show up. With grace, humor, and heart—you make it work.
🌟 Takeaway:
You never know what one moment—one ad, one choice, one blessing—will ripple into.
And just like weddings, intuition is sacred work. It holds people together, honors what’s real, and brings light where others expect noise.
Be the calm in the middle of the scene.
You may just change everything.
With warmth and love,
Nancy
