Have you ever ghosted your own business? I have, many times. I did it recently, in fact. I could lie and say I was hiding away for the entirety of Mercury retrograde in order to avoid the chaos, but it would indeed be a lie, because what I was actually doing was hiding away from my desired reality. 

 

My desired reality scares the shit out of me, actually, and while most business coaches would say that's a sign of being on the right path, my avoidant tendencies would like a word. I can create desirable alternate realities, like the gorgeous Sims 3 neighborhood I recently built from scratch: a magical island where the moon is always full and everything is covered in redwoods and the residents are all of magical ilk. It's creatively satisfying. It's fun. But it's a reality I cannot insert myself into. It's an attempt at a controllable utopia, albeit one I can never live in. 

 

Sometimes, with the way my ADHD is set up, I find myself going on these elaborate creative rabbit holes when I'm avoiding doing the “real work” which would lead me closer to my desired reality--and for me, that “real work” is my business. The reason I attribute this to my ADHD is because it's all about lacking intrinsic motivation. 

Recently, I was telling my husband how growing up undiagnosed meant my lack of intrinsic motivation caused me to be seen as lazy and lackadaisical, and when I did figure out ways to motivate myself into action, it often came with a lot of (internal and external) shame about needing these additional supports. That meant even when I found a method that worked for me and my unique brain-- especially if it required negative motivation--I still berated myself for not being able to “just do it.” 

 

Well fuck you, Phil Knight. Maybe I will always require some sort of negative motivation in order to do the things which are not inherently interesting to my brain. It is what it is, but what does that mean for my desired reality? Will I be able to motivate myself to any sort of meaningful action if I'm living the life of my dreams? 

 

And it's that thought which leads me to ghost my business on a semi-regular basis--on top of all the other external factors, like late-stage capitalism and fascism and being the only money-earning person in my nuclear household, yes, but truly… it's the idea that there will be no more negative motivation, and thus no more meaningful work for me to do. Nothing more to be urged to create. 

 

I've been calling this kind of cyclical thinking “getting stuck in the birth canal,” because it literally keeps me stuck between the life I can no longer inhabit and the life which I am desperately trying to create. Waffling about why I am doing what I'm doing often does feel like I'm doing something, but I'm too old to fool myself anymore.

 

What dug me out of this latest slump was starting a journaling practice again--for the first time in five years. I used to fill up journal after journal, sometimes an entire notebook a month. And whaddaya know, dipping into the ocean of pure, vibrant consciousness in this way again has reminded me that I don't just run my own business to nurture my desired reality, but also because I am a human and must create. That's why I'm always talking about the nature of running your own business, because when you're ejected from the prescribed path by your failure to live up to capitalism's ableist standards, what others call a “side hustle” can become one of the most enduring and transformative relationships you will have in your entire life. This thing that you create, that you birth, that you materialize, can become a constant companion and a source of infinite motivation. 

So, maybe I ghosted my business for a few weeks after my latest workshop was finished. That's progress to me, because I used to ghost my business for months on end. And I'm also working on recognizing that every launch is a birthing process, and you're supposed to rest & recover after giving birth. Creating a more ADHD-friendly business for myself means going forward, I will be scheduling in these breaks after launches, instead of just dropping everything immediately and having to fight the impending shame spirals. 

 

As a Capricorn, I love to plan ahead, and I love helping others to do the same. This year is the third year I am offering year-ahead astrological reports, and I'm extremely motivated to be offering these again. Whether you have big moves planned for 2026, you're just curious about the vibes, or you're wondering where to direct your efforts in certain areas of your life, this is a bespoke resource that can serve as a guide and a reflective tool as you traverse this temporal territory. 

 

Year-ahead reports are $150, and to keep them as financially accessible as possible, 5-month and 10-month payment plans are also available. If you prefer a more collaborative experience, these year-ahead reports are also available as a live Zoom consultation. Keeping in line with ADHD-friendly business strategies, I have raised the price on live readings to reflect the energy & logistics they require, both for preparation and recovery.

 

If you have a business--especially if you are neurodivergent--you've probably ghosted it at least once. There's no shame in that, and also, planning ahead astrologically can give you a different angle on time. As Alison Kafer says, disability is a “disruption in the temporal field.” Astrology is one way of reconnecting to the temporal field in a way that affirms your being instead of rejecting it.

 

Moving into 2026, I'm excited to continue writing and sharing with you (there is so much to say, it seems!) and I'm also vibrating with excitement about some other opportunities for us to continue learning together. More on those later.

 

Talk soon,

 

Sam