Do you consider yourself a positive or negative person? Are you known to lift or lower the vibes of a conversation? How easily do you let things go?
If you want to feel good in midlife and beyond (and who doesn’t?!), start with your thinking. You, or someone you know, has deeply rooted habits that block their immense joy and life satisfaction. The good news? These habits are easy to notice and possible to break.
Take the next few days to notice how often you find yourself engaging in the following three habits:
Complaining
You have a frustrating experience and just want to ‘vent’. You can’t believe someone acted in a way you wouldn’t. The weather is too hot - or too cold. Traffic is unbearable.
There are SO many things to complain about!
But what if you looked for things to be grateful for instead? Can you share about feel-good interactions, inspiring experiences, or problems solved? How different might it feel to share a personal win or celebrate one of a friend or colleague?
There are SO many positive things to share!
Worrying
You have a lot going on in life, so worrying is a common habit - especially for women! But it is a breakable habit.
The worry you experience related to things outside of your control is unproductive at best and paralyzing at worst. It’s out of your control after all. Break away from this type of worrying.
When there is an element of control related to something you’re worrying about, then you have a choice: decide to take positive action or let it go. Seek to alleviate this kind of worry rather than spiral into it.
Criticizing (Yourself and Others)
Criticizing ourselves or others is closely tied to complaining. Rather than being the fault-seeking person in the room (or your mind!), why not be the one who looks for ways to be kind and supportive or share her love and light?
When you hear yourself criticizing, pause, take a deep breath, and check in with your kind and caring self. Would you say these things to or about your closest friend? Are you sharing your words in a helpful tone with love in your heart, or are you coming from a place of anger, jealousy, or frustration?
From here, decide to let it go or find an appropriate place and time to communicate directly with the person you want to receive the criticism.
As you move through the next few weeks, gently observe when you fall into these three habits. Kindly ask yourself, ‘Is this helpful?’
In most cases, the answer will be no, which is your cue to let it go. In the rare instances where you answer yes, decide on an action you can take to make a positive difference - then take it. If you can’t determine one, then this is also a sign to let it go.
Create more awareness around these 3 habits to catch yourself before you engage. Keep at it, and these will no longer be habits. You’ll notice a difference in your mindset, mood, and energy as they dissolve.
I’d love to know about your experience as you become aware of and release the habits of complaining, worrying, and criticizing. Reply to this email to share with me, my friend!
In this week’s episode of FLIPSIDE OF MIDLIFE®, I expand on how these three habits keep you from experiencing the good vibes and well-being you deserve in midlife and beyond. Click the button below to listen.
