Hola First name / Tribe,

 

In my early thirties I lived as a resident at a Zen monastery in Southern California. Like many practitioners, I arrived with a sincere devotion to practice — long hours on the cushion, silent incense filled mornings in the zendo, the rhythm of communal life organized around meditation and mindful living.

At one point the Roshi gave me what was considered an honor within the monastery: the position of head chef.

If I’m honest, I remember feeling a little irritated.

The role meant that during the early morning hours — when the rest of the sangha gathered in silence to meet their individual koans — I would be in the kitchen preparing the morning meal. While everyone else sat in robes on their cushions, I moved quietly through the kitchen chopping vegetables, boiling eggs, washing rice.

It felt, at first, like I was missing out.

But something began to shift over time.

In those quiet early hours, moving mindfully through the kitchen, I began to recognize that I was no less in practice than the community sitting in the meditation hall. The kitchen became its own form of zendo. Each movement — cutting, stirring, cleaning — was another place to meet my mind.

And I began to see how practice wasn’t separate from life.

It was happening right there in the middle of it.

I was meeting the same edges that appear on the cushion — impatience, distraction, resistance, presence. What had seemed like two separate worlds, practice and life, were actually unfolding together.

Two seemingly opposite things existing at the same time.

That lesson followed me long after I left the monastery.

Years later, it appeared again through motherhood.

I often felt like I was at a disadvantage trying to balance my teaching life with the responsibilities of being a mother. I would see other women on the path around me who didn’t have children — able to spend long hours in temple space, immersed in practice — while I was waking at 4am just to carve out a small window of meditation before the day began with kid, breakfast, school schedule, tantrums, and everything else.

At the time, it often felt like I was somehow doing practice “less well.”

What I didn’t recognize then was how deeply integrated my practice was becoming.

In many ways I was learning what it truly means to be a lay practitioner — someone whose practice unfolds not in long stretches of retreat or temple time, but woven directly into the fabric of daily life. 

Into dishes, conversations, sleepless nights, school runs, teaching, and the constant unpredictability of family life.

Over time something subtle began to change.

The thread between practice and life became less visible because it was no longer something I had to consciously weave. It was already there.

What once felt like a tension — practice versus life — slowly became a kind of fullness where both were present at the same time. 

Meditation wasn’t only on the cushion anymore.

It was at the dinner table hearing about my son's day at school.
It was in a heated argument with my partner before bed.

It was at being humbled by an email at my desk before opening a zoom teaching event.
 

And looking back, I can see that the places where I once thought I was “falling short” were actually the places where embodiment was quietly taking root.

Because the real practice isn’t only what happens in the meditation hall.

It’s what happens in the middle of a very human life.

 

Practice may be deeply personal, but it’s also something that is strengthened in community. Having spaces where we can return together — even briefly — can help keep that thread of awareness alive within the realities of our everyday lives. This is the spirit behind the Axioms of Grace membership.

 

I’m delighted to share the opening of the Axioms of Grace Membership.

This space has grown out of a desire to continue nurturing the life-giving energy that arises when women gather in intentional, sacred space. Many of you have experienced how powerful it can be when we pause together to honor natural cycles and mark transitions through simple ritual.

The Axioms of Grace membership is an ongoing New Moon Circle with a private online community. Each gathering is an opportunity to step out of the momentum of daily life and return to alignment with what matters most — your intention, your inner vision, and the deeper rhythms that support our lives.

Our next 3-month cycle begins Thursday, March 19th.
If you’d like to join this round, it’s best to sign up soon so you can be set up on the platform and receive the call link for Thursday’s gathering.

(If you miss this cycle, the next round will open in the summer.)

These New Moon circles are designed as a space of return — a moment to reconnect with your deeper direction and the unfolding energy of the lunar cycle. In each gathering I will share a short teaching, guided inquiry, and meditation to help ritualize our engagement with the coming month.

Each person receives from these attunements exactly what they are ready for.

For those who enjoy continued connection between gatherings, the membership also includes a private online forum where reflections and insights can be shared within the community.

Women’s New Moon Circle
Next cycle begins March 19

 

 

Because in the end, the real practice isn’t somewhere else — it’s right here in the middle of our very human lives.

With my love,