Hello My Wonderful Friends,
One morning this past June, I had a conversation in the parking lot of camp drop-off, and the sequence of events that followed led me to an absolute explosion of inspiration, creativity, vision and motivation. I will share more about this in the coming weeks (check Instagram!), but for now the important thing is that the universe is shaking me by the shoulders and demanding that I expand.
Which is such great, exciting news! Also, honestly a bit rude and intrusive; I was doing fine, thanks. Summer is hard: the kids' camp schedules are weird, the custody schedule is weird, it's hot, the laundry is different... I am out of my groove. Where I normally have a regular cadence of signing forms, making dentist appointments, reconciling my billing… in summer I'm already squeezing those things into the cracks of a schedule I can't keep track of. Sometimes I literally do not know where in Los Angeles I will need to be 2 hours from now, and I am just throwing Hail Marys one after the other. My kids need to be in 2 different places starting at the same time in an hour? Ope! I hope that works out for all of us!
So then add in a major call to create something I really care about and it's like ENOUGH ALREADY. It's so busy in my mind!! I told a friend recently that all I want to do is meditate; just spend all day surrounded by quiet order and watch my gazillions of thoughts pass by like clouds; enjoy the moments in between when there's nothing but clear space. My body is craving small. Less.
Expansion and contraction is the way of the universe. The Big Bang, the tides, our lungs and heart, our lives. Exploding in bursts of energy, and coming together to rest and gather strength. I'm learning that writing is this way: an idea comes and I grab it, explode a bunch of messy spaghetti in a notebook, and wait a couple of days. The idea contracts naturally, forms into something tight with a shape, and when I sit down again it expands into purpose.
Our homes can do this too.
When I help clients who feel overwhelmed, I try to start by cutting to the core of what really makes their heart sing. What makes them feel like their favorite self? I want to set them up with a home that easily expands around these important, core things. Cooking, or comfy chatting with friends. Setting up a child for homework success. Presenting well in a Zoom meeting. Making messy, joyful art at the dining table. How can their homes expand to support these moments, and then effortlessly contract back into a manageable baseline? I've done my job when the paint and glue and glitter become a celebration instead of a source of fretting. I've done my job when I've created space for my clients to lean in, to be fully present with the people and experiences and feelings that make them whole.
I've had the pleasure of working with a few long-term clients, and it is so beautiful to watch their areas of expansion change. I've seen their lives grow and take shape in new ways: a new job or career, a new family member, a new home, a new relationship. Each new phase contains new priorities for expansion, so we tweak and rearrange, or shed the whole setup and start fresh.
And isn't that living! We are always becoming, finding new things that light us up. Reconciling those new things with who we've been, and shedding what no longer applies. Walking around like raw glowing blobs of hope and uncertainty, trying to figure out what shape we'll take today.
At her Pleasure Tour concert a couple of years ago, Janelle Monáe told me that "There is no pleasure without safety." I think about it every day. When our home holds up the most cherished parts of ourselves, we are safe to expand into them.
If you're interested in talking more about this, or you'd like to find ways your own home can hold space for your expansions, I'd love to chat.
