Image Description: a vertically oriented paper collage sits on a windowsill flanked by succulents in ceramic pots (one on either side) and trees outside in the background – the collage centers a b&w photo of what appears to be a young Black man holding a newborn to his chest; there is a large penny covering his left shoulder with a satellite color image of the Earth covering Abe Licoln's head; a b&w photo of a young Yoko Ono holding a crystal ball fills the upper left corner with an illustration of a scorpion under her left hand.
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🌑 God Is Change
Thank you for being here and taking time to read this email. I felt touched by the many loving messages since my last missive. 🥰
How was your Equinox? To state the glaringly obvious, the collective astro-weather has been bonkers for a long while now. For me, it feels like all the atoms in my body have been re-configuring. Rapidly at times. This is disturbing. Also, thrilling. Yes, my health & life challenges this past year have been quite intense. But this period has also been filled with miracles & magic, and that can be harder to communicate.
My personal atomic combustion will settle soon. I know this intuitively and through astrology — by tracking planetary transits through apps, receiving excellent readings from Sasha(a while back) and Kirah (recently), and listening to a ridiculous number of episodes of The Astrology Podcast (#istanchrisbrennan).
This is not turning into an astrology newsletter.
I started and continue studying astrology completely on my own – through podcasts/videos, books/reading, and online workshops. I had only received three readings in my life before this recent deep dive which began early in the pandemic because I wanted to better understand my own chart. I am still very much a newbie. I approach the cosmos with immense awe and humility.
Just the other day, I realized that this is the only time I have immersed myself in intensive study without the influence of a specific teacher. That was not intentional. And, it is a blessing as I aspire to forge my own unique, innovative spiritual path in an ongoing, emergent process. I am certainly not an astrologer, nor do I have any intention of becoming one. I study astrology simply because, right now, it gives me great pleasure and meaning to do so.
I am curious what’s gonna happen now that I mentioned God. 😇
Image description: Meme illustrating a tilted bald head with text asking: “Why you so quiet? What’s on your mind?” and text inside the head with the response: “What if ‘God’ is just the existence of consciousness and every living being is a localized and temporary expression of the same interconnected and eternal phenomenon?” Image source: @embodiedastrology
Of course, the subject line God Is Change is a reference to Octavia Butler’s Parable series (iykyk). The statement comes from the scriptures of “Earthseed,” the spiritual philosophy created by the main character, Lauren, who, when the story opens in 2024, is an adolescent Black girl living in apocalyptic California. Besides being gorgeous and genius, the books (written in the nineties) are prescient a.f. (climate disasters, technological delusion, racial polarization, and a U.S. president who rises to power by promising to “make America great again” 😮). Lauren is a brave leader who crafts visionary community to counter the chaos and destruction all around her. The following is the essence of Earthseed:
All that you touch
All that you Change
The only lasting truth
Since I was a girl, I desperately longed for a romantic partner and idealized coupledom. I had no mature models of marriage around me (literally not one) and no innate understanding of what makes a healthy couple. Yet, I decided (with the help of overdoses of mass media) that being coupled was the primary way to happiness. Finding a mate became a constant fixation.I projected most of my relational trauma and conditioning onto lovers and boyfriends. My abandonment patterns led me to fear being alone, even at the expense of abandoning parts of myself (or asking others to do the same). I was devoted to the dominance of coupledom.
Consciously, I know that being coupled is not necessary for my joy and wellbeing (often, it was a detriment). Unconsciously, I believe/d that staying coupled is more important than honesty or authenticity or freedom – that being uncoupled is and is to be undesirable. At one time, I would have classified uncoupling as an unwanted outcome – as if the point of coupling is to stay together, rather than braving to touch and be touched. At this time, I am practicing being courageous within a constantly changing cosmos.
May we all find lasting truth in change.
With much love,
I am considering creating a one-time offering/workshop for anyone interested in exploring their own idealization of coupledom (whether you are currently coupled or not). It’s tentatively titled Uncoupling From Couple-Dom.😜 I won’t be “teaching” so much as leading a collective process for reflecting, journaling, processing, & connecting… If you might be interested to explore the ways you idealize coupling, please let me know here so I can get a sense if there’s energy around this idea.
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