A RECORDING FROM 2018 ABOUT GETTING THROUGH ‘TWIXMAS’

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Dearest First name / One,

 

 

Although we are now in the New Year, I'm writing this in that liminal space between Christmas and New Year, which turns out to have a name - Twixmas. That's what the video above is about, and I hope you find it helpful. (And if you're not one for watching videos, you can read an article I wrote about Twixmas for World Childless Week here.)

 

Watching the recording again now, seven years later, I realise that I've now moved into an even deeper level of acceptance around how ‘different’ my life looks to the mainstream than I realised. These days, not only do I make zero plans for this week, I've discovered that it's my favourite bit of the holiday shennaginans: no plans, no expectations, no commitments. Just a free-floating week when I can, as the beloved childless poet Mary Oliver wrote, let ‘all the voodoos of ambition sleep’. Of course, with Long Covid continuing to kick my butt, I've probably had more practice with this than ever before; having got tired (and a wee bit embarrassed!) at having to back out of commitments due to my energy levels and weird autonomic wobbles, I've pretty well much given up saying yes to anything!

Looking back on December, one of the very few events I took part in was to host a MASSIVE Fireside Wisdom with Childless Elderwomen call on the theme of ‘Celebrating OUR Light’. It brought together 15 childless/free Elderwomen from around the world, both solo and partnered, to share nuggets of wisdom on how to navigate the holiday season, as well as taking up space with our countercultural notion that women without children live meaningful lives! It left me, the other panellists and, if the emails of thanks are anything to go by, all of you, with a huge lift to carry us through this challenging time of year. If you haven't watched it, do yourself a favour and do so before the year runs away with itself - this is wisdom and energy we need all year round!

 

Thank you to each and every one of you who is reading this. Gateway Women had always been a ‘we’, not a ‘me’, and I simply couldn't have made it through and kept on going without you. In April 2026, Gateway Women will be 15 years old and, if I'm well enough, I hope to offer something to mark that milestone. A lot has changed for me in that time, and for so many of us, but there's still so much to do to support the childless women in the rising generations to find us, and to find each other. Because we rise together. Always.

This newsletter takes a day (at least) each month to write and produce. If you'd like to support my work, you can leave me a tip at BuyMeACoffee, and I'll probably do exactly that with it, no doubt, whilst also reading a book you've helped me buy :)

Recorded live in December 2025, this gathering of 15 childless/free Elderwomen from around the world was a triumph of wisdom, hope and humour. The contributions from both solo and partnered women offers solid advice on living in a pronatalist world - which frankly is useful all year round! Do take an hour and enjoy this extraordinary recording. And for information and links on all the panellists, click here. Save the date too for our next webinar - Saturday 14 March - when we'll be returning to our regular small panel format for more in-depth reflections. The link to register for that will be available mid-February.

What is the Reignite Weekend? 
The Reignite Weekend is the transformational healing weekend that I created in 2012 (and ran personally 50+ times) in many different countries. It now continues with my team of licensed facilitators in London (UK) and Australia, and in 2026, for the first time in 4 years, I'll be co-hosting one too in Ireland. The testimonials continue to show that this weekend often marks a ‘before’ and ‘after’ moment in the trajectory of childless women's healing from the heartbreak of childlessness. Info, testimonials, booking links here.