There’s nothing wrong with desiring good, even godly things like wanting our loved ones to know Jesus. We may long for physical healing or to experience a shift in one of our relationships. However, when we’re obsessed with how things should be, the danger is that we often become impatient when our prayers aren't answered according to our timing.
For example, take the Old Testament couple Abraham and Sarah, who spent years waiting for God to keep His promise to give them a child. However, there seems to be a point at which Abraham and Sarah allowed their obsession with having a child to cause them to jump ahead of God’s timeline, resulting in significantly more stress and overwhelm than they bargained for.
I’m sharing their story today because I think there’s a little Abraham and Sarah in all of us: When we become obsessed with what we want, we must avoid the temptation to take matters into our own hands.
In Genesis 12, God told Abraham that He would make then-Abram into a great nation and all the people of the world would be blessed through him. In Genesis 15, Abram questioned that promise because he didn’t have a son. God reassured Abram that a child was coming. Here’s Abram’s response in Genesis 15:6:
And Abram believed the Lord, and the Lord counted him as righteous because of his faith. - Genesis 15:6 NLT
In that moment, Abram had a bedrock, unshakeable belief. Perhaps you've heard, “God said it, so I believe it.” That's how we want to live, right? But then, time goes on and nothing happens.
In Genesis 16, the attention shifts to his wife, Sarai. She's impatient because there's no child yet. Abram agreed to his wife’s scheme to take matters into their own hands to produce the baby that God already promised. They forced their servant Hagar into a slave surrogacy. This wasn’t God’s plan. God doesn’t fulfill His promises through manipulation or prompting us to use controlling behaviors.
While I acknowledge Abram and Sarai’s lack of faith in that moment, I have compassion for all the years of their infertility-related heartache. Still, their obsession put them on a collision course with many years of unneeded pain. After Hagar became pregnant, there was abuse on all sides (
Genesis 16: 4-7). After Hagar’s son, Ishmael, was born, that innocent little boy grew up in a home that held the tensions and likely resentments of adults who tried to play God and got burned.
Yet, through it all, God remained faithful to His promise. Fourteen years later, when Abram was 100 years old, a post-menopausal Sarai gave birth to their covenant miracle son, Isaac (Genesis 21:5). In the end, Abraham and Sarah received their miracle baby, but relationships were damaged along the way.
WHY DO WE TAKE MATTERS INTO OUR OWN HANDS?
It's usually one or more of these three reasons:
- God seems to be taking too long, and our hearts ache so much that we can’t stand it.
- We panic when we think of all the worst-case scenarios if what we’re praying for doesn’t happen.
- We’re afraid that God won’t give us what we’ve set our hearts on.
As you look at those three reasons, which one seems most relatable to you?
Just like I have compassion for Sarah, I have compassion for anyone who can relate to one of these three reasons. We don't have to beat ourselves for wanting something, but it should also prompt us to seek God’s help instead of going our own way. God invites us to share how hard it is to wait. In
Psalm 13, where King David says, “How long, LORD?” four times in that one psalm! David poured his aching heart out, and that leads me to believe that God welcomes our lament and confusion when we’re in long waiting seasons as we're encouraged to keep trusting Him.
MY GO-TO PRAYER WHEN I’M TEMPTED TO HELP GOD OUT…
If you have a little Abraham and Sarah's impatience inside of you, then this is where God desires for you to surrender that deep desire or obsession to Him. There’s a brief prayer from my
Stronger Than Stress Bible study that helps you step into trusting God.
Here it is: God, I can’t. But You can. I will let You. Amen.
Do you need to pause right now and offer up that prayer? This maybe the most important prayer you pray today, especially if you've already been cooking up plans to deal with someone or something that is best left up to God. Stop now and pray!
MY OWN PERSONAL JOURNEY…
I’ve prayed for a spouse over five years. After fighting for my first marriage for many years, God healed my heart after my long, sad divorce. I was surprised that I would have a healthy desire for a second chance at love and marriage. But, the road hasn’t been easy. Either I’ve been criticized for wanting to remarry, told that I’m too old, too tall, or rejected because I’m abstinent until marriage (which has been the biggest issue by far!), waiting on God amid this deep desire has been hard. Yet, this journey continues to draw me closer to God as I wait instead of taking matters into my own hands.
I know that many of you can’t relate to my specific situation, even though some of you can. Maybe you’re wrestling with a desire to purchase a particular house, car, or possession, but the finances aren’t there yet. Perhaps your spouse isn’t going to church, and you’re tempted to use manipulation, nagging, or guilt to get them to attend. Some of you are navigating a long infertility journey like my daughter, Sami, and you've been praying for years for children. Whatever it is, there will always be a temptation to take a shortcut and grab what God hasn’t given to you yet. Getting what we want can't fill us like only God can.
PRACTICAL THINGS THAT HAVE HELPED ME
While there are seasons when I handle the longing desire better than others, I’ve chosen to anchor my soul into these words from Psalms 84:11:
The Lord will withhold no good thing
from those who do what is right.
This psalm doesn’t promise that God will give us whatever we want, rather, the psalmist reminds us that God will not withhold all the goodness that comes from His nature as our Abba Father and Almighty God. When we fix our minds onwho God is and live like we trust Him, we receive God's best for us right now. Here's what anchors my spirit when my feelings are all over the place:
I am receiving God’s best for me right now because God is with me at all times.
Here are three practical ways to live out trusting God while we wait:
- Instead of lying awake all night thinking of how to get what we want, we turn on a worship song and focus on God so we can rest in His peace (Isaiah 26:3).
- Instead of thinking of worst-case scenarios if it doesn’t turn out as we’d hope, we practice gratitude and remember God’s faithfulness (Lamentations 3:22-23).
- If we’re afraid we won’t get what we’d hoped for, we replay God’s promises and remember that He never withholds any good thing from us (Psalm 84:11).
I’D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! What was your score on today's quiz? You can hit reply and let me know. What has weighed heavy on your heart lately that you need to surrender to God? If today's devotion resonated with you, feel free to hit reply with “surrender" so I'll know!
