I keep children's chewable Tylenol tablets in my purse because my son (like me) gets frequent headaches. Before I tell you why I'm sharing this, it's important to note that my purse is a pretty decent size. It's become a portable black hole filled with things I forget even existed. And among those things, was an open bottle of those chewable tablets that seemed to have been crushed into powder over time. A powder so fine that it had morphed into what can only resemble something you'd find at a Hollywood party and not something all over the bag of a 38-year old mom of 2 coming in to get her mole checked at the doctor's office.
Had I known that this powdery substance would be all over my fingers when I reached for my wallet, I likely wouldn't have chosen to put on bright black nails that same morning. But given the fact that medical offices have long been a breeding ground for my most mortifying moments, I really should've seen this coming. And to make matters worse, I was there to get a mole checked on my nose. MY NOSE. I could only imagine the story the receptionist may have painted in her head, “Girl with white powder residue on her nails comes in for an itchy nose, blames mole."
I thought about nervously assuring her that it was indeed Tylenol and not cocaine all over my fingers but I felt like that would sound even more insane. And as a certified expert of consistently looking guilty during moments when I've done absolutely nothing wrong, I decided to put my tail between my legs, and do a walk of shame towards the waiting room.
Spoiler alert: My mole turned out to be fine, my reputation was not.
